
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/2310074.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Major_Character_Death, Rape/Non-Con, Graphic_Depictions_Of_Violence,
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M, F/M, F/F
  Fandom:
      Super_Junior
  Relationship:
      Kim_Youngwoon/Choi_Siwon, Cho_Kyuhyun/Henry_Lau, Choi_Siwon/Han_Geng_|
      Hankyung, Kim_Youngwoon_|_Kangin/Park_Jungsoo_|_Leeteuk, Cho_Kyuhyun/Lee
      Sungmin, Henry_Lau/Lee_Donghae, Cho_Kyuhyun/Hang_Geng_|_Hankyung, Kim
      Ryeowook/Shin_Donghee_|_Shindong, Choi_Siwon/Shin_Donghee, Kim_Heechul/
      Kim_Youngwoon_|_Kangin, Kim_Youngwoon_|_Kangin/Lee_Sungmin
  Additional Tags:
      Suicide, Alcohol_Abuse/Alcoholism, Food_Play, Domestic_Violence, Rape,
      Gender_or_Sex_Swap, Pedophilia, Sibling_Incest, Underage_Sex, Extremely
      Dubious_Consent, Fluff, Alternate_Universe_-_Magic
  Stats:
      Published: 2014-09-15 Chapters: 11/11 Words: 30130
****** All I Can Taste Is You ******
by orphan_account
Summary
     The Freud theory of oral fixation effects everyone in some way or
     another. After all, the mouth is one of the most inmate and
     complicated parts of the human body.
     [This was written about three, maybe four years ago. I'm only really
     uploading this so I have more work on here. I'm not in the SJ fandom
     anymore.]
     Each chapter is read-alone.
***** Pill *****
His back hit the mattress. Holding back a laugh, Siwon slowly brought his hands
up, motioning for the other to follow and join him on the abused mattress. A
soft smile stretched his lips as Youngwoon crawled on to the mattress, hovering
over him, eyes smiling and lips descending upon his.
Gasping breaths were shared as Youngwoon’s hips ground down onto the younger
ones, tongue and teeth battled with an intensity that had appeared from
nowhere, the gentle touches of lips left behind to make way for the pair to
fight a war with deep moans and scratching nails.
Clothes were easily discarded, thrown aside to be lost in the rubbish of
Youngwoon’s bedroom. Free, heated flesh slid together, sweat running across
panting flushed skin. Light taunting fingertips traced spirals up the inside of
pale thighs, Siwon was helpless, unable to do anything more than throw his head
back and beg for more of those sacred touches. When a strong hand wrapped
carefully around his aching member Siwon growled and pulled Youngwoon down for
a bruising kiss, ignoring the distant tint of burning alcohol on Youngwoon’s
tongue.
Cool fingers pressed against his entrance, two at once, moving impatiently
slowly into Siwon’s heat. Youngwoon groaned as he felt muscles contract and
move around his fingers, drawing them deeper in, he tried desperately not to
think about how glorious Siwon would feel around him, all that tight, hot
pressure surrounding him, with a groan he slipped another finger into the
taller man, curling his fingers, stretching the other quickly. Siwon cried out
and bucked his hips when heavenly fingers brushed against his prostate, shivers
of electric ecstasy darting through his system. “Oh my- Youngwoon- hyung-
please I need you to- I need- o- ohh please-” Siwon’s panted the words out,
squirming underneath Youngwoon, trying to impale himself further on those
fingers.
This was something so foreign, so strange about this. They shouldn’t fit
together so well like this. It was uncomfortable and it hurt like hell but all
the same Siwon was in a whole new place, and he loved it there. Youngwoon was
above him, inside him and all around him. He was so busy trying to steady his
breathing and to not completely loose himself, he almost didn’t feel
Youngwoon’s hips shift as the elder leant down, lips against his ear, breathing
in sharp ragged breaths as he asked in an almost pleading tone, “Are you okay?
Tell me when I can move.” Shifting his head so their lips met Siwon mumbled
“Move” against Youngwoon’s mouth.
His hands had found the wall, he was pushing himself back down the mattress as
Youngwoon set a desperate pace. Siwon couldn’t remember when his legs had moved
from around Youngwoon’s waist and left to hang over the others broad shoulders,
but he didn’t care because in this new position he could feel every fucking
inch of his best friend pushing deep into him. Siwon’s voice ripped from his
throat as Youngwoon found the right spot again. Crying out and pushing himself
closer to the other, he felt Youngwoon’s movements become more sporadic and
messy. A fumbling, shaking hand found his neglected member and curled around
it, stroking it at the same ferocity as Youngwoon’s hips pounding into him.
They came together, Siwon crying out as his hips bucked, milky white fluid
covering Youngwoon’s hand all the while Youngwoon emptied himself inside Siwon,
riding out the last of his orgasm until he withdrew and collapsed beside Siwon.
They both laid there, hot, sticky and panting, not saying a word. Youngwoon
rolled over and looked across at Siwon who was looking back him, expression
calm and sincere. Siwon smiled when he felt fingers crawl into the palm of his
hand and spread out until all their digits were tangled together.
**
Youngwoon’s fingers trembled furiously; he increased the pressure of his grip
around the plastic bottle just to make sure he wouldn’t drop it. He needed
this, he couldn’t do it anymore. It just hurt too much.
The curtains were closed tight against the glaring orange light of dusk that
coated the streets of Seoul. The front door of his apartment was wide open
hanging uselessly on its hinges from where Youngwoon had fallen through it in a
drunken stupor of tears. The entire place was a tip, newspapers strewn across
the floor, the ink sinking through to the carpet below from where they had
managed to get wet through spilt drinks Youngwoon never bothered to clean up.
Old takeaway boxes piled up in the corners of the room, a pile of the rancid
boxes at the end of a sofa, buzzing with the flies the leftover food had
attracted. The fridge was empty and smelt rank with mouldy food. The cupboards
were damp and were inhabited by a variety of spiders. The light switches
throughout the whole apartment were dusty, Youngwoon didn’t bother with them
anymore. The light just exposed him and left him more vulnerable than he
already was. His room was littered with soiled clothes, pornographic magazines
and liquor bottles. He’s broken the frame of his bed months ago in an angry fit
so he slept on a mattress under the window with a few dirty sheets. The
bathroom was the only room in the house which was at any level of presentable.
Its frequent use meant that it didn’t have much of a chance to accumulate the
same level of despair the rest of Youngwoon’s home had. In shallow attempts to
make himself acceptable for the rest of the group Youngwoon spent a few hours
every morning getting ready before meeting with the other members to go ahead
with their schedules. He’d broken the washing machine so he washed his clothes
in the sink. He washed himself under the shower and left without looking in the
mirror he’d smashed a few days after moving in a long while ago knowing if he
didn’t look right that Jungsu would fix him up, laughing about how useless
Youngwoon was at dressing himself.
Nobody knew about Youngwoon’s pit of a home. Whenever they suggested coming
around he made up excuse after excuse until they gave up asking. Only Siwon
knew what was going on. Because there was no way Siwon couldn’t know, they’d
grown up together. Youngwoon ended up telling Siwon everything - even without
putting it into words.
Siwon had visited a few times. He’d picked his way through the trash, heart
breaking with every step. It killed Siwon to see his best friend like this.
He’s tried everything he could think of to help Youngwoon get back on his feet,
Siwon had even told Jungsu about the drinking problem. But the drinking was
only the surface of the problem. Youngwoon was drowning in his own depression.
He’d lost himself in the darkness. Youngwoon was so lost that it made Siwon
question how his God could let something like this consume such a close friend.
Youngwoon hadn’t answered his cell all day, it was a rare day off for the group
and everyone was off doing their own thing, mainly visiting family. But Siwon’s
own family was currently in Japan on a business holiday and Hangeng was out on
a shopping date with Heechul. So Siwon decided to try and coax Youngwoon to go
out with him for the day. Giving up with trying to contact his friend by phone
he made his way over to the apartment, deciding he’d try to physically drag
Youngwoon out in to the real world.
But when he got to Youngwoon’s apartment the door was hanging open and there
was no sound coming from inside. Instantly panicking Siwon charged in, yelling
Youngwoon’s name, he tore through each of the small rooms, throwing rubbish and
clothes aside, trying to unearth his best friend. It wasn’t until his tall form
barrelled through the bathroom door and hands scrabbled frantically for the
light switch did he find Youngwoon. Curled up in the corner of the shower,
silently sobbing into his knees, fingers gripped around an empty bottle of
painkillers. Several more empty bottles which once contained pills surrounded
the shivering male, cheap plastic containers filling up with water under the
stream of water. Siwon couldn’t see any signs of alcohol but he could smell it.
The pure stench of vodka perfumed the entire room, radiating from the crying
body.
Siwon dropped to his knees beside the shower, hands diving in through the open
door and pulling Youngwoon out, not caring that he was getting soaked himself.
Youngwoon yelled and struggled, not having realised there was anybody else in
the apartment with him, too far gone to hear when Siwon had been running around
calling his name. When Siwon had clung on to the frozen panicking form until he
stopped fighting and whispered in his ear that it was okay - it was only him,
it was then Youngwoon had relaxed, his previously tense body slumping against
the strong chest behind him. Siwon shuffled back so his back was against the
wall and Youngwoon was cradled in his arms, sat between his legs. Siwon felt
hot tears slide down his own cheeks when Youngwoon’s icy fingers wrapped around
Siwon’s own hands and held on. Youngwoon choked on his sobs, letting go of
Siwon suddenly to spin around where he was so he was facing Siwon, hugging the
taller man closer and burying his face into the crook of Siwon’s neck.
“What have you done hyung?”
Youngwoon only shook further and his fingers gripped into Siwon’s clothes in a
grip so tight he tore through the material of Siwon’s shirt.
“Shit hyung, I have to get you to hospital. I’m not letting you do this. You
can’t. Youngwoon-ah please let me help you. I need to take you to hos-” Siwon’s
pleads were cut off when Youngwoon’s quivering hands gently took either side of
Siwon’s face. With tears still falling thick down his cheeks Youngwoon leaned
forward so that his forehead rested against his best friends. After taking a
shuddering breath he leaned forward further and ever so softly pressed his lips
against Siwon’s. Youngwoon’s eyes slipped closed as he concentrated on the
gentle pressure of their lips and not on the churning sick feeling running
through his system which he realised with mild interested surprise was how it
felt to die. His body was slowly shutting down, the drugs gripping his heart
and slowly tightening its grip letting him live out his final moments in quiet
and content agony.
Youngwoon abandoned Siwon’s lips and hugged the younger male again. Siwon sat
stunned, not quite sure what had just happened. “Youngwoon-ah, let me help you
please. I- I can’t loose you. Not now. Not ever.” Youngwoon shook his head and
mumbled something into Siwon’s shoulder that he couldn’t hear. He carefully
pulled Youngwoon back so he could see his face and asked him to repeat what
he’d said.
“I d- don’t want help S- Siwonnie-yah… I j- just want to s- sto- stop f-
feeling s- so bad. Please, p- please just s- stay w- w- with m- me. S- stay
with me S- Siwon-ah. Please.”
“H- Hyung, I’m not going to sit here and let you- l- let you-” Siwon couldn’t
push himself to finish the sentence, instead his throat closed up as the
reality of the whole thing crashed around him. Fresh hot tears streaming down
his face he hugged Youngwoon closer, wrapping the pair up into a cocoon of
limbs. “Why? W- Why?”
Youngwoon didn’t answer, he couldn’t. He had no idea to say to explain how he
felt. He couldn’t find the words to explain the hollow black hole in his chest.
Holding on to Siwon tighter and ignoring the heavy burning in his lungs and
heart. It was getting harder to pull in a new breath, his head was swimming
from the lack of oxygen but his lungs were shutting down, they just weren’t
strong enough to bring in the air Youngwoon needed. He had no idea if he could
talk, he wanted to tell Siwon he was sorry.
Sorry for all the things he’d done wrong, sorry for the drunken phone calls. He
was sorry for crashing his car after going out and getting Jungsu in trouble.
He was sorry that he’d made Siwon put up with his problems and go through hell
with him. He was sorry he’d seduced his best friend on a number of occasions,
pulling Siwon into bed more than once when it was clear Siwon had no intention
of sleeping with him. He was sorry he had no talent. He was sorry he was no
good with words. He was sorry he just couldn’t get anything right.
Youngwoon felt his whole body trembling, his heart hurt, his head hurt, his
lungs hurt. He couldn’t breathe. He felt Siwon’s arms hold onto him tighter,
the pressure felt he was being crushed, his whole body ached like it was on
fire. The quicker this ended the better, if he didn’t die he would surely pass
out from the pain. This was too intense, he couldn’t do it. He didn’t want to
hold on he didn’t want to fight. Youngwoon felt something shift inside of him
as he realised something. He didn’t have to bear the pain. He didn’t have to
let it hurt him. If he just relaxed, if he just let go it would all stop. If he
just went with it, it would all just-
**
Siwon’s chest rattled with force of his tears, he kept trying to hug Youngwoon
closer to him, because if he held on tight enough maybe, just maybe he could
hold on to Youngwoon’s life too. When the arms around his waist slackened bit
by bit until they dropped down by his sides and the chest against his own
stopped heaving Siwon felt a scream bubble up at the back of his throat, lungs
aching he yelled and cried, holding Youngwoon’s body closer to him, sobbing
hysterically until neighbours pulled him away, paramedics all over his best
friends body, moving it away from him. Siwon fought and cried, struggling
against the mass of hands holding him back. It couldn’t end like this. It
shouldn’t. It can’t. When a slender pair of arms engulfed him, drawing into a
surprisingly strong hug and Jungsu’s voice whispered in his ear Siwon knew that
it would end like this. It had to. And it already had.
***** Sugar *****
Henry groaned and rolled over, this was killing him. He could practically hear
it calling him but it was midnight, and midnight meant he was far too sleepy to
get up and walk all the way to the kitchen. But as much as he tried to clear
his mind, all he could think about was the huge stash of cavity filled snacks
Mimi had bought earlier on in the day.
The cupboard full of deliciously tempting sweets.
The sugary, sticky syrup sat waiting in a glass jar.
Plastic wrapped, brightly coloured and mouth-watering gooey and sinfully good
food all sat waiting for him to…
Henry was already shuffling his way through the SJ-M dorm, trying to be as
quiet as possible before the thought of giving in had even finished forming in
his brain.
**
When Kyuhyun had cleared his throat to announce his presence Henry had stopped
still before turning around slowly, three fingers coated in syrup still in his
mouth, eyes wide and he stared back at the taller man who was looking at him
thoroughly amused, smirk stretching across his sleepy face. Sat on the worktop
in the dorm kitchen, legs swinging happily as he helped himself to the snacks
and sweets cupboard, Henry felt like a child caught by his parents stealing
pudding before dinner.
Kyuhyun strode forward, taking the jar of syrup from Henry, leaning into the
smaller boy’s ear. “Henry-yah, you know you’re not allowed in there. You’ll get
sick if you eat too much of the stuff.” Henry didn’t reply, and just sat with
three fingers stuffed in his mouth, ignoring the syrup slowly dripping from his
chin. He was too busy focusing on Kyuhyun’s mouth at his ear and the hand which
had appeared on his thigh. A hand which was slowly getting higher before
brushing back down again, getting closer and closer to Henry’s crotch with
every stroke. Henry shuddered. Kyuhyun chuckled low in his throat, before his
free hand darted forward and grabbed the hand that was half in the youngers
mouth and the other cupped Henry though the loose sweatpants. The Canadian
squeaked and shrank away from Kyuhyun, ignoring the fact he was subconsciously
grinding against the hand laid on his cock desperately trying to get some
friction.
“No no, don’t open your mouth.” Kyuhyun warned, “I want to watch you lick every
bit of this crap off yourself, okay?” Henry nodded, locking his eyes with the
dark pair before him and sealed his lips around his fingers, sucking them
further into his mouth. He oh so slowly drew them out making sure to catch as
much of the sugary liquid as possible. Balling his hand into a fist Henry kept
watching Kyuhyun as he ran his tongue along his knuckles drinking in the
delicious taste, grinning when Kyuhyun’s eyes broke away from his to stare.
Extending his fingers Henry wrapped his tongue around his index finger and
slowly worked his mouth over the digit, hiding his growing smirk by repeating
the action on each of the other fingers.
Kyuhyun couldn’t drag his gaze away from the hot darting tongue and smirking
lips. He watched growing harder, so distracted by that sinful mouth that his
hand was stationary against Henry’s crotch. It wasn’t until Henry frowned, lips
pouting around his thumb, and bucked his hips before Kyuhyun came back down to
Earth and mashed his mouth against Henry’s sticky lips. He pulled Henry forward
flush against him mashing their groins together which made them both gasp into
the kiss. Kyuhyun worked his hands into Henry’s sweatpants kneading the soft
backside, letting his fingers brush against Henry’s entrance every now and
then, driving the younger boy mad.
Henry’s soaked and sticky fingers glued themselves to Kyuhyun’s hair, fingers
slipping into the curls and gripping on without mercy. Their lips crushed
together, cemented in a furious open mouth kiss, tongues peeking through trying
to taste the other through the sugar.
Henry pulled his hands out of Kyuhyun’s hair, making the other yell as some of
his hair was pulled out. Mouthing a quick ‘sorry’ Henry pushed Kyuhyun’s own
sweatpants down just low enough to free his cock, instantly wrapping his messy
hands around the heated flesh, coating it in saliva and syrup. Breathing out
curses as Henry worked on his member, Kyuhyun slipped his fingers back down and
under Henrys ass, pushing one dry finger into Henry’s entrance. He swallowed
the cry of pain with a chaste kiss before sliding the finger out and forcing it
back in again, repeating himself until he was adding in another finger, and
another, until he had four fingers working inside Henry, stretching him dry.
Henry was gasping, his body trying to take in more oxygen as his mind focused
entirely on ramming himself down on Kyuhyun’s fingers. It hurt, it hurt like
hell but the friction was just so damn good Henry couldn’t care less that he
was on fire. Letting go of Kyuhyun, Henry leant back so he was laid awkwardly
across the worktop and shuffled further forward so his entire bottom half was
hanging off the worktop edge, Kyuhyun pulled his fingers away and shifted so
that his crotch was pressed flush against Henry’s backside. With Henry laid out
in such an odd position Kyuhyun couldn’t reach far enough to kiss him, so
instead he let his hands glide along where ever they liked in feather light
touches, whilst laughing at Henry in his flushed, helpless state as the smaller
boy ground his ass against Kyuhyun’s cock.
Unable to draw the moment out much further, Kyuhyun’s hands wound down Henry’s
body, one gripping the dancers hip, the other slipping under the heated body to
guide his slick member into Henry. Kyuhyun groaned his appreciation at the same
time Henry let out a high pitched cry, tears falling down his flushed cheeks as
his hands flew backwards, searching for purchase against the cold tile of the
kitchen wall looking to ground himself against the pain.
Mumbling incoherent words of comfort Kyuhyun slowly moved his hips, drawing
back and pushing back in again, moving incredibly slowly with control Kyuhyun
didn’t know he possessed. He kept going, moving gently to allow Henry to get
used to the feeling. It wasn’t long before Henry was pushing himself against
Kyuhyun, trying to increase the pace. Swearing Kyuhyun stopped moving all
together and pulled out, Henry whimpering at the loss. “Fuck… Henry, get off
the worktop and bend the fuck over.” Kyuhyun growled, stepping back, allowing
Henry to slide off the worktop and lean over.
Less than a second later Kyuhyun had slammed himself into Henry again, hands
gripping onto the others hips as he pounded into the youngest member of the
Mandarin subgroup. Henry’s eyes were scrunched up tight as he swore his
appreciation, hot breath ghosting across the top of the work top as Kyuhyun
pushed all the air out of him with every thrust of those talented hips.
Kyuhyun was so close, he could feel Henry hot and tight all around him,
begging, pulling him in. And every English curse slipping from the smaller’s
lips only dove him wilder. Groaning as he felt himself nearing the finish, his
hips fell out of rhythm, he felt himself shaking as Henry gasped at the change
of pace.
Henry was hot all over, sweating and gasping, he detached one of his hands from
the worktop and wrapped it around his own aching member, trying to match
Kyuhyun’s desperate thrusts. Biting down into the soft flesh of his own arm,
Henry screamed as he came, messing the side of the cupboard with his come. He
heard Kyuhyun cry out behind him, and felt the others warm release inside of
him. When Kyuhyun pulled out he felt cold and empty, whining Henry turned
around, resting against the worktop as he took in Kyuhyun’s flushed state.
Taking the older boy by the hand, Henry led them towards his room muttering
something about sleep. Kyuhyun followed, already nodding off.
***** Smoke *****
Chapter Summary
     The end of this is disgustingly cheesy.
Hangeng sat propped up against the wall, the dirty white sheets barely covering
his naked lap. He dug around in the pile of clothes next to the mattress for
his lighter and cigarettes. Clicking the mechanism into life he let his eyes
slip close as he took in the first drag of poisonous smoke. Hearing a disgusted
tut Hangeng peered through his lashes at the other. He watched the other man
pace the room, eyes following as the slightly taller male muttered to himself
in distressed Korean too fast for Hangeng to understand though he was fairly
sure he caught the gist of it. This man obviously regretted paying for the
services the Chinese male offered, but that wasn’t Hangengs problem. This man
had come to him and willingly handed over his money for the privilege of
pounding an old whore into the ancient mattress. “Look. What’s your name?”
The other froze mid-step and looked at Hangeng as though it was the first time
he had seen him and hadn’t spent the previous hour with Chinese legs wrapped
around his waist. “What?”
“Your. Name.” he repeated slowly as though the other was stupid.
“S- Siwon.”
“Get the fuck in bed and shut the hell up.” Hangeng growled before taking a
drag from his cigarette, grinning when he felt the mattress dip at his feet.
“But I can’t afford-”
“It’s free.”
Siwon stared, trying to work out the catch. “Free?”
“Free.” Hangeng lunged forward and grabbed Siwon by the hair with one hand and
the other held the cigarette out of harm’s way. Tugging the younger man forward
Hangeng held Siwon in front of him, faces inches away from each other before
instructing him to open his mouth. Confused Siwon did he was told before
gagging and struggling as Hangeng let a cloud of smoke transfer from the
Chinese mouth to the Korean one. Hangeng crushed their lips together ignoring
the distress from the other, he kept his lips moving against Siwon’s perfectly
carved plump ones until he felt Siwon relax slightly and give in to the kiss.
Loosening his grip on the curly mass of hair Hangeng moved his hand down to the
back of Siwon’s pale neck to angle him better so he could persuade Siwon to
open his mouth further and let Hangengs tongue into the warm cavern.
Somewhere in the back of his mind Siwon made a mental note to never let his
wife take up smoking. This man kissing him now tasted foul but in an odd sort
of sick way Siwon couldn’t bring himself to push the prostitute away. Hangeng
tasted of a slow painful death and that fascinated Siwon. He’d been taught that
Hell was an eternity of painful torture and slow death, but if his made him as
light-headed as this, maybe letting this washed up whore commit sin after sin
with him wouldn’t be that bad.
Mouths still moving together Siwon brought his hands up to Hangengs waist,
rubbing small circles with his thumbs that had the other fidgeting and moaning
into the kiss. Hangeng pulled away suddenly, shaking his head. “No, I’m on top
this time.” he stated simply before bringing his cigarette around to take a
heavy drag before leaning over and crushing it into a nearby ashtray.
Siwon stopped dead and blinked. “What? No. That‘s not what I‘m pa--” the rest
of his sentence was cut off when Hangeng pounced and pinned Siwon down across
the sheets, rolling his hips, grinding down on Siwon’s lower half, managing to
entice an reluctant groan from the man’s plumps lips.
“I can do what I want, you’re not paying for this round remember?” Hangeng
chuckled, the sound reverberated through the hollow room making it sound
sinister. Siwon wasn’t listening by this point, he’d given in. This man knew
how to make him feel good, less than ten minutes ago this talented, beautiful
Chinese man had made him feel better than his wife of ten years ever had and
now he was offering to make him feel that good again, and Siwon just wasn’t a
fool enough to say no. His large, trembling hands reached up for Hangeng’s
hair, pulling him down for another breathless kiss.
Taking their time to explore the others mouth, Siwon’s tongue met Hangengs and
together they tasted each other. Gasps and groans swallowed easily as Hangeng
increased the friction between them as Siwon wrapped his arms around the
Chinese mans neck, pulling them flush together. Pulling back from Siwon’s hold,
Hangeng took in the flushed, half naked form of his ex-client. Not sure why he
was doing this, and why he wasn’t charging this man. When Siwon first
approached the prostitutes front door Hangeng had found the Koreans fumbling
guilt and his barely contained embarrassment far too irresistible. And against
his better judgement, over an hour since Siwon had first arrived, he found his
hands going for the belt of the others jeans once again. After their first
round had finished, Siwon had all but leapt out of bed and pulled on his jeans
and began his pacing and muttering.
Siwon’s eyes flickered open at the soft touch of Hangengs hands on his jeans,
pulling them down off his long legs. Giving the taller man one last kiss on the
lips, Hangeng kissed a trail down across Siwon’s jaw, licking, nipping and
soothing a hot pattern down his pale neck, leaving sore bruised marks on his
collar bone before slipping further down the others body. Lips and tongue
burning their way down Siwon’s perfected torso, Hangeng dipped his tongue into
Siwon’s navel, repeating the action when Siwon bit back a curse and his hips
flung upwards. Drinking in each and every one of the repressed gasps and pleas,
Hangeng carried on his way downwards, licking hot wet stripes across Siwon’s
heated flesh, chuckling as he nipped at the deep ‘V’ of Siwon’s hipbones making
the younger man let out a long low groan that sounded almost miserable. Hangeng
finally reached Siwon’s aching cock, stroking it gently with tortuously slow
movements, he pressed light kisses along the length, listening to the other man
choke and let out broken moans. Closing his eyes, Hangeng moved his mouth over
the tip, sliding his tongue across the slit before drinking in the rest of
Siwon’s cock.
Siwon’s groaned as Hangeng’s hot, wet mouth slowly slid down his member, he
cried out when he felt the Chinese man hum in appreciation, hands flying
downwards to tangle into the others hair. He felt that talented tongue
underneath him, applying wonderful pressure as Hangeng took Siwon deeper into
his mouth, almost beginning to feel himself slide down the back of Hangeng’s
throat. All Siwon could hear was his own erratic breathing when the older man
paused before the pressure around his cock increased suddenly and Hangeng drew
back, lips swollen and shiny as he looked up at Siwon’s flushed face from
between his legs. “This is going to hurt. I’m not going to pretend that it
isn’t, okay?” he warned in stumbling Korean before Siwon simply nodded and
relaxed into the sheets.
Siwon automatically froze when he felt hands slowly part his legs further and
warm fingers stroke their way up the back of his thighs. This felt so foreign
and so strange he almost snapped his legs shut again, but when Hangeng’s hand
laid it’s self on his hip so carefully and as if to provide some sort of
comfort Siwon felt himself automatically relax again. He focused on keeping his
breathing steady when a hand brushed over the soft cheeks of his backside and
wandering fingers floated over his entrance before Hangeng sucked on three of
his own fingers with a wink at Siwon, who rolled his eyes and decided to stare
at the ceiling, forcing his mind back to concentrating on taking a breath in,
then out again.
There were hands on his backside again, those wandering fingers dancing about,
then out of the blue there was a mouth on his cock and at the same time a
finger worked its way into him. Siwon gave a strangled cry as he couldn’t work
out whether to feel violated or pleasured as both washed over him at once.
Hangeng ignored him and started a steady pace, preparing Siwon with his fingers
while slowly working his tongue over Siwon’s cock. Before Siwon really knew
what was happening, three fingers disappeared from inside him and that heavenly
mouth disappeared which had him so, so very close to the edge. He felt hands on
his hips and something a lot larger than he felt prepared for pushing into him
slowly. Crying out Siwon felt his thighs shaking from the effort of keeping
them still and not attempting to clamp them shut and removing the Chinese man.
Hangeng growled low in his throat as he felt the younger man constrict and
tense around him, he gritted his teeth in an attempt to stay still and not
pound the man into the mattress, regardless of Siwon’s comfort. “Relax, it’ll
help.” he offered while his nails slowly dug into the soft flesh of Siwon’s
hips. After a moment and Siwon’s breath had steadied a little, Hangeng drew his
hips back experimentally and slowly pushed back again. Siwon let out a garbled
shout and Hangeng knew he’d found the right place and began to pick up the pace
bit by bit. Within minutes they were moving together, cursing and loosing track
of the tempo as they both tried to create as much friction as possible.
Siwon had already been so close to coming beforehand but now with Hangeng
abusing his prostate he could feel the heated tension building up, he knew he
wasn’t going to last much longer. He tore a hand away from the sheets which he
had been holding onto for dear life and snuck his hand down over his own cock.
With a heavy moan he followed the same pace as Hangeng’s hips and within
seconds it was all over for him, he came with a sharp cry, his hips bucking out
of control as he released over his hand.
Hangeng swore loudly in a string of fast Chinese as he felt Siwon’s walls
flutter around him and clamp down as the younger man beneath him climaxed, the
extra pressure around his cock drawing out his own release. The last of his
energy drained Hangeng collapsed beside Siwon, his chest rising and falling as
his lungs tried desperately to stabilise his breathing. Exhausted he rolled his
head over to a side, watching Siwon’s face flush a deep red and a sheepish
smile creep up on the youngests face. A sincere smile graced Chinese lips, “you
know what? I’m going to miss watching that pretty face blush when you leave.”
he muttered in soft Chinese, more to himself than to Siwon.
“I could always… come back… another time?” Siwon replied quietly not meeting
the others eye, it took Hangeng a moment to register the skip of his heart when
he realised that the man below him had spoken in Chinese. Not able to find the
words to reply Hangeng moved cautiously, slowly until he had one hand at either
side of Siwon’s head and was looking down at him, his own slender body laid
flush against the Korean one. He looked down, eyes searching for the other
man’s bluff, trying to work out why he was stepping over the safety line of
having a strictly pay-by-favour relationship with this man. Unable to find the
answer in the soft and handsome features of the younger man, Hangeng kissed
him. Slowly, their lips touched, barely moving, pressure only slight allowing
for a strange dancing tingling sensation to spread alight along their lips and
dart through each other’s systems. As the kiss grew slowly braver, lips moving
a little more, Hangeng felt his elbows weaken. His fingers laid slack in the
sheets, his brain forgot that he was laying skin to skin with someone who over
an hour ago had paid him for sex and then slept with him again mere moments
ago, and that they were nothing more than strangers. His brain forgot that this
was going to end badly, that this man had other commitments and would probably
leave after this and carry on with his normal life and he himself would be
forced to carry on with his normal life, sleeping with people and spending the
money on rent, cigarettes and alcohol. Instead his brain focused entirely that
his elbows had just connected with the mattress and that he was kissing this
man, Siwon, he was kissing Siwon with so much desperation and so much need. It
wasn’t until he pulled away slightly to press chaste kisses to the others lips
and he thought he heard Siwon mumble ‘I…I think… I love you’ between kisses and
panting breaths did Hangeng’s brain register that he had replied, ‘I think I
love you too’ in an equal state of breathlessness.
***** Talkative *****
Chapter Summary
     Please heed the warnings this chapter has graphic rape and domestic
     abuse.
     Also features female!Jungsu - so this is Het.
“Oppa hates you.” Kangin growled, voice low and dangerous. Leeteuk looked up,
peering at the taller man she whispered, voice shaking.
“Say that again.”
Kangin took a step forward, trapping Leeteuk on her perch at the end of the
bed. She sat beneath him, frozen and staring up at him, eyes wide as she
silently dared him to carry on talking. Kangin’s lips pulled back in a feral
grin. He brought his hands up to Leeteuk’s face, fingers gently playing across
her flushed cheeks, thumbs brushing over her lips. He gave a soft hum of
appreciation before it morphed in to a growl and his hands suddenly shot into
her cropped blonde hair, tugging her head back viciously before lowering his
face to hers. “Oppa fucking hates you. You cheap slag.” He hissed, hot breath
dancing over her features. She shrieked, Kangin felt the shiver than ran
through her run up his arms. She tried to push him away but he shook her off.
“What the fuck are you doing? Stop it Kangin-ah.” Leeteuk gasped. Kangin’s grip
in her hair tightened, Leeteuk let out a small scream, her eyes welling up with
tears. Her face drained of colour. “K- Kangin that hurt. That wasn’t funny,
this isn’t funny. Stop it. Now.”
“But this was what you asked me to do, remember?” Kangin snarled, lips curling
up in disgust as he looked down at Leeteuk. His voice was smooth, low and deep,
he was so close to his partner he could feel his words drip across his partners
lips as he spoke each letter. He brushed his lips against hers, it wasn’t a
kiss, just a touch. He grinned when Leeteuk didn’t respond. He moved his lips
against her jaw, nose brushing her silken skin as his head filled with her
scent. He never once let up on his hold on her hair. “I’ve been thinking…
considering how to place my thoughts and tell you right… we haven’t been… all
that honest with each other recently… now have we Angel?” the pet name that
Leeteuk usually loved made her blood turn to ice.
“W- What are you t- talking about? What do y- you mean t- this is what I asked
you to do?” It was incredibly difficult to talk with her head pulled back and
her throat seared with the effort to sound calm.
“Siwon hyung. You’ve been getting awfully cosy with him recently. Texting him
all hours of the day, going for coffee together, meeting up after you finish
college… even emailing him, complaining about me. Now tell me, Teukie Angel,
how is it I’ve become ‘distant recently, like I’m not there when I’m stood
right next you’ huh? You‘ve been asking me to punish you ever since you started
seeing that fat eyebrowed freak behind my back.”
Leeteuk’s mouth opened with silent words, she stared for a second before
finding her voice again, “Y-you’ve been reading my emails? How could you do
that oppa? That’s just a- a violation of my privacy! You have no right to go
through my things! Siwonni- Siwon oppa is just my friend, my best friend,
nothing more! He has Heechul and he’s happy with her! And I- I was going to
talk to you about y- your d- distance, I was j- just asking Siwon oppa how to
talk to you properly a- about it. There’s nothing g- going on! I swear oppa!
Please let me go Kangin, please?” however just as soon as she finished Kangin
pulled her backwards properly by her hair, till her back bounced off the
mattress with the force he had moved her, scream ripping from her throat. One
of his large hands quickly smacked across her face cutting her scream off.
“Don’t you fucking dare lie to me and expect to get away with it you whore!”
Kangin hissed, spitting in his anger, his voice warping as he tried to bellow
at his girlfriend but keep it down so the neighbours wouldn’t hear. “I know
what you do, fucking around, screwing other blokes behind my back like your
slut of a friend Heechul does. Does Siwon know she sleeps around? I should tell
him that my poor unfortunate slag of a girlfriend can’t keep her legs closed
and is teaching his partner to do the same? I’m sure he would just love to be
told all about it.” Leeteuk shook her head best she could, eyes filling up with
tears, but it just managed to wind Kangin up further. “Don’t start crying you
pathetic idiot, that’s not going to help anything is it?”
Kangin let go of her head, swinging his leg over Leeteuk and dropping his
weight down so he was sat on her waist, his hand still laid across her mouth.
He looked down at her, seeing only the imaginary filth that she had been coated
in by her imaginary lovers. “You’re fucking disgusting, you know that right?
Tell me that you’re disgusting, go on, tell me.” He took his hand away.
Instantly Leeteuk started screaming and thrashing about, legs kicking uselessly
behind Kangin, hands scrabbling and scratching at any stretch of skin she could
find. Swearing Kangin wrestled her arms down over her head and pinned them
there with one hand, his other hand landing it’s self over her lips again.
“That’s not it, that’s not what I said was it sweetheart? Tell. Me. You. Are.
Disgusting.” He glared at her, grip tightening on her wrists as he once again
lifted his other hand away.
“Kangin what’s going on? Why are you doing this? I’ve done not-” Leeteuk’s
babbling was instantly muffled when he slammed his hand down, smacking her so
hard he felt her teeth sink into the palm of his hand. Irritated he spat on
her, laughing as she cringed away from him, the spit landing in her hair.
“You can’t take one simple fucking instruction can you? You’re disobedient
babe, always have been, and I’m going to have to be the one to teach you how to
listen. Be thankful it’s me Teukie, anyone else wouldn’t be as kind. I remember
having to teach Sungmin the same fucking lesson. All you women are whores, you
couldn’t keep your legs closed and panties up if your lives depended on it.”
Leeteuk could feel Kangin shaking with rage, the hand covering her mouth
shaking with alarming ferocity. As he rambled he eyes blazed with anger, as she
stared back, stunned into stillness by Kangin’s rage, she could almost imagine
Sungmin where she was now, just two years ago. Leeteuk remembered questioning
Sungmin about the various bruises and injuries the other girl tried so hard to
keep covered up. Leeteuk remembered, with her stomach churning as her memories
flashed by her, how small Sungmin looked against the hospital sheets,
explaining to the doctors in an unusually quiet voice that she’d broken her arm
again by falling down the stairs, or tripping over the cat or slipping on wet
floors. Leeteuk felt the need to throw up when she remembered how they’d sat
together in the cafeteria more than once, laughing at Sungmin’s clumsiness. She
remembered when Sungmin moved away last year, promising to send letters and
keep in touch but every time Leeteuk checked the mail in a morning, or her
emails on a night, there hadn’t been anything from her friend. Only now did
Leeteuk realise why, Sungmin didn’t want Leeteuk to know where she was, because
if Leeteuk knew, then Kangin knew. Leeteuk felt her heart racing in her chest,
her head was swimming from trying to breathe properly though her nose, her
wrists and mouth burned where Kangin was touching her. She was just a
replacement for Sungmin. She was just another lump of meat to abuse. Her vision
of Kangin’s contorted ranting face above her blurred as she felt hot tears
running down the side of her face.
“…fucking slutty cunts like you just aren’t worth my time. What the fuck are
you crying for? This is what you deserve, I’m not going to do anything you
haven’t earned you little cow. Shut the fuck up. I’m going to teach you, I’m
going to show you just why you never ever go behind my back.” Kangin was
growling. Somewhere in her hysterical mind, Leeteuk wondered when Kangin had
gotten so talkative. It had been part of his charm when she first met him, all
those years ago. He never usually said a lot, he wasn’t the type to waste
words, he always knew the right ones to say to win any argument, claim any
girls heart or get his point across. But right now he seemed to be spewing
every word he could think of, slurring obscenity after obscenity at Leeteuk as
she shrank against the sheets. Normally words like this didn’t bother her, she
could take any insult and laugh it off, she was bullet-proof. The intensity of
the situation she found herself in now however left her completely open and
vulnerable to his verbal attack. As she laid there, pinned down and helpless,
she hoped that it would be over quickly, whatever Kangin was planning on doing
to ‘teach’ her. The quicker it ended, the quicker he would leave her alone and
she can get away.
Kangin growled, he lifted Leeteuk up by her arms, and removing his hand from
her mouth he pulled her shirt off over her head, ignoring as she instantly
started rambling a mix of reassurances, ranting that she had done nothing
wrong, begging him to let her go and shouting for help. Swearing and yelling at
her to shut up Kangin threw Leeteuk back down again and stuffed her shirt into
her mouth, muffling her almost into silence as he shoved the entire piece of
clothing into her mouth till her nostrils flared with the effort to breathe and
fighting off to urge to gag on the fabric threatening to crawl down her throat.
Leeteuk tried to push her shirt back out again with her tongue but Kangin had
trapped her so that if she tried to move the shirt, it’d would only slide
further down her throat.
Leeteuk felt herself sobbing again as Kangin ignored her struggling and dragged
her skinny jeans off her slender legs with one hand. The button he hadn’t
bothered to unfasten catching her skin and cutting a long red welt along her
lower stomach and down one of her legs, making her scream against the gag.
Kangin just smirked and left the jeans on a pile next to Leeteuk on the bed.
She could feel his growing erection pressing on to her stomach where he sat.
He’d stopped talking now, he was just looking at Leeteuk with something behind
his eyes that she couldn’t place. He looked insane, his eyes were all over her
almost naked body, eyes lingering on her heaving chest. It was his favourite
part of Leeteuk, when they’d been cuddled up together in bed in the past, all
sweaty and exhausted from making love over and over again, and he’d sit Leeteuk
up against the headboard and rest his head on her breasts, small happy smile on
his face. The first time he’d done it Leeteuk had asked what he was doing, too
high on euphoria to push him off. He had wrapped his arms around her waist and
stayed silent for a moment before answering, “This right here is my favourite
part of you. Here I can hear your heart beating. I can feel your lungs
breathing, I can sense your blood rushing around, keeping you alive. I love
this part of you Teukie, everything about you is so alive, so happy and this
right here, your heartbeat, is what makes you like that. So I’m staying here,
listening to you live.” Leeteuk remembered how a smile had stretched her lips
involuntarily, she had laced her fingers into his short hair, holding on to him
as she whispered barely loud enough for him to hear, “I love you Kangin oppa.”
It felt like a whole other world away from the Kangin sat on top of her now,
holding her arms over her head with a grip tight enough to break her wrists and
leering at her exposed body like some sort of animal. Leeteuk closed her eyes,
trying to calm her breathing as best she could. She felt Kangin’s hand on her
jaw sliding down her neck, between the peaks of her breasts, down the rest of
her torso, slip around her waist till his fingers were fumbling with the latch
of her bra.
She disconnected herself, concentrating solely on how she was going to get away
once he was done. Deciding it pointless to try and kick him off, he was bigger
and stronger than she was. She’d only end up worse off if she tried to attack
him. If he leaves me on the bed I could make a dash for the door and run
through the house till I was outside. My mobile phone was on the stand next to
the front door I can grab it on my way out.
Kangin slid the bra up her arms, slipping the strap off one arm completely.
Moving the free arm under his knee so he was sat on it and free to use both
hands he secured the strap on one side around the wrist on Leeteuk’s other arm,
making sure the knot was tight and wouldn’t slip before hooking the bra around
the post on his bed and grabbing her other arm from underneath him, doing the
same again so that she couldn’t use either of her arms. He sat back and admired
her. She had her eyes scrunched up tight and he knew she was trying to distract
herself with something. It was a habit of hers when things got tough, she’d sit
and fill her head with stupid stories or sing to herself, literally escaping
reality. With her arms pulled up over her head like they were her breasts were
arched up higher, pale and perfectly formed they fit perfectly into the palm of
his hand. The flush of panic that was spread across her face and neck was
beginning to crawl along her chest too. Kangin smirked, it only made her all
the more attractive. He groaned slightly when he realised how hard he was, cock
straining against the inside of his jeans. He’d have to fix that.
When I’m out the front door I’ll go next door, Mrs Lee is in and I’ll hide
there till Siwon oppa turns up. I’ll borrow some of her clothes. I’ll ring the
police too… They keys are on the stand with my phone… I could lock him in the
house, trap him until the police arrive.
Kangin raised his hand, fingers falling along the smooth curve of her cheek,
thumbs brushing away her tears. He dropped his hand to tickle a finger behind
her ear. She used to purr when he did that, it drove him crazy to hear he make
such a sexy noise. It was a shame that she couldn’t make any noise now. He’d
love to hear that low humming purr. But oh well. Kangin frowned for a second,
raising his hand up before dropping it a little, changing his mind. He sat
there one arm half raised while he looked down at Leeteuk. He wasn’t sure if he
wanted to hit her. Would it be worth it? Well… there’s only way to find out. He
brought his hand up fully again and swung it down, fingers curled up into a
fist. The crunch of his knuckles connecting with her cheekbone and the
painfully high scream set Kangin’s skin on fire. This was good, this felt so
damned good. Smiling to himself he kissed her forehead, lips pressing softly
against her hot skin. He kissed he already swelling cheek, down her neck and
along her collar, nipping softly. People had to know that she was taken, he
decided. He bit down onto her collar harder, breaking the skin and lapping up
the blood. He sucked deep purple bruises along her neck, biting again once or
twice, just to make sure. She was his, and only his whether she liked it or
not.
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Right calm down, calm. One. Two. Three. Four. Five.
Six. Seven. Oh fuck this it’s not working. I’m at Mrs. Lee’s house, waiting for
Siwon oppa to pick me up and the police to grab Kangin oppa. What do you do
next Leeteuk? Think! I… I keep an eye out the window, borrow clothes, make sure
I don’t panic Mrs. Lee too much. When oppa gets here I’ll run out and jump in
the car, tell him to drive as fast as he can, take me to his house, ask him to
let me stay with him and Heechul-ah for a bit.
Kangin licked the cuts, to make them feel a bit better. He didn’t like marking
Leeteuk, it ruined her flawless skin, but it had to be done so that the
bastards she was sleeping with knew that she was taken. Shifting his weight
down Leeteuk’s body so that he was sat on her knees Kangin let his hands skim
along the entire length of her body, tracing the outline of her waist, kneading
her breasts gently, feeling the flat stretch of her stomach. He tried not to
laugh when she flinched away from his touch, pressing herself deeper into the
mattress trying to get away from his hands. He remembered when she used to arch
up into his hands, mould herself so that she fit alongside him, she couldn’t
get close enough she had said. With a sad sigh he punched her again, this time
aiming for her stomach. He watched as she tried to fold up, tears running down
her cheeks as she gasped for breath. It made him kind of sad to think that she
was now afraid of him.
A point she proved when his fingers continued to trace the outline of her
hipbones, fingers pressing slightly, when his fingers hit the top of her
underwear she started screaming loud enough to be heard over the gag. She tried
kicking her legs and tried to dislodge the makeshift cuffs holding her arms
back. She twisted her body as much as she could in her given position, trying
to shake him off. She was crying hysterically, screaming and shouting into the
gag, coughing as it fell deeper into her mouth.
OH FUCK! Shit! Oh god someone, anyone please help me. Please please please
don’t let him do this please please oh god oh god why me? Someone please please
someone.
Kangin growled, he didn’t like this, she had been behaving so far, why had she
kicked off now? He roughly grabbed her waist, holding her down into the
mattress, stopping her from moving completely. Irritated he held her down with
one hand and pulled off her underwear with the other, swearing when she clamped
her legs together making it harder for him to pull the flimsy fabric off.
Letting go of her waist he punched her square in the jaw, before his hands
darted downwards and grabbed her underwear yanking it down, moving himself out
the way. Laughing in celebration Kangin flung the underwear at Leeteuk’s face,
roaring with laughter when it landed on her face and slid off, sitting like a
crown above her head.
Leeteuk gave up screaming and started begging against the material for him to
let her go, that she’d forget about everything that had just happened, that
she’d forgive him if he stopped now and let her go. When Kangin started to
creep his way towards her legs again she shrieked and started kicking out at
him, trying to aim for his crotch or chest, anywhere that would hurt him enough
to slow him down or stop him completely. She screamed bloody murder when her
foot caught him between the legs and he yelled, grabbing her ankles in his
hands. He started yelling at her, she couldn’t hear what he was saying she just
kept struggling, trying to keep herself as far away from Kangin as possible.
He was cursing and growling as he pulled her legs apart roughly, crawling up
the bed again to fit himself between her shivering thighs. She was babbling
again, shaking her head and crying. But Kangin didn’t pay any attention, he was
furious. She’d kicked him, that wasn’t how this meant to happen. Angry, Kangin
ground himself against Leeteuk’s naked skin, grinning when shivers ran through
him as he felt the friction build up and heard Leeteuk choke on panic.
Chuckling he leant back again, sat comfortably between her knees. He made sure
to catch her eye as he lifted up the front of his shirt slightly, slipping his
hand beneath the waistband of his jeans, letting his fingers flow over his
member trapped in his underwear. Hissing slightly at the light touch he pulled
his hand out of his jeans and quickly undid them. Leaning over Leeteuk so his
face lined up with Leeteuk’s Kangin smiled, his eyes smiling more than his lips
were. Leeteuk looked up at him, eyes shining and red with tears, her left eye
was swollen and purpling from where he had hit her, she was shaking and her
lips were red from being stretched around the fabric of her shirt. Kangin
murmured that she was beautiful, planting a kiss on her forehead and moved
away, hands pushing down his jeans and boxers.
Leeteuk tried to scream when she felt him hot against her but it withered and
died in the back of her throat when Kangin’s hand moved her legs so they were
bent at the knee and the soles of her feet laid flat across the bed sheets. A
few stray tears blurred her vision when she felt him guide himself into her.
Once he fully sat inside her she broke out in sobs, the stretch was
uncomfortable and burnt, but it was the situation, the fact that she had
trusted this man, she loved him almost unconditionally, they’d spent so much
time together that had her crying out in tears as he landed each thrust. She
couldn’t make any sense of anything anymore, the world was a haze no matter how
much she tried to blink the tears away. Her lungs were on fire with the need to
bring in a proper mouthful of air. The shirt was tickling the back of her
throat, deadly close to making her throw up. Her skin felt like it was on ice,
the freezing cold burning her. Her heart ached, it felt like Kangin had
literally plunged his hand in through her chest and squeezed the vital organ
until it burst in his grasp.
Kangin groaned, Leeteuk was so hot around him, hotter than she usually was.
Maybe she liked it when he did this? She needed to stop crying though, Kangin
found it annoyingly distracting. Hips still moving he leant in till his mouth
was at her ear. Speech impaired by breathless groans he whispered, “Teukie
baby, stop crying. I don’t like it. Stop it, or I’ll hurt you. Understand?”
when she didn’t reply Kangin growled dangerously low straight into her ear. A
bubble of a whimper escaped her lips. His teeth fastened around the stud in her
earlobe and he pulled his jaw away, ripping the small winged shaped piercing
out of her ear. The scream she let out hurt his ears. She started struggling
again, frantic and desperate. Kangin had to stop moving and grab her hips to
keep himself inside her. He spat out the earring and the taste of blood off to
a side, laughing at Leeteuk screaming and crying, ear pouring crimson stains
all over the light blue sheets. She was so beautiful all red, purple and white.
He was getting close now, he could feel himself nearing the finish and
Leeteuk’s cries be damned, he wanted to come. Slamming his hips forward he
finished himself off at a furious pace, coming inside her, chuckling when she
tried to shrink away from the warmth.
He pulled out and sat to the side of Leeteuk, looking down at her, he looked
almost curious. Leeteuk could hardly see him though the tears. The incredible
stinging pain in the ear was almost unbearable. Her eye was now swollen shut
and her jaw was clicking. She hurt everywhere, she had no idea what was going
to do next, she laid there sobbing and aching, her escape plan completely
forgotten. She shrieked when his hand came up again, the last thing she saw was
hit fist come towards her then everything went black.
***** Fresh *****
Chapter Summary
     Chapter warnings: Incest, underage sex, manipulation into sex/rape,
     inability to consent due to age.
“Make sure you brush your teeth hyung, or else Appa will know you’ve been
drinking again.” Sungmin warned as he crawled into his bed. Kyuhyun threw him a
glare but stumbled through to the bathroom anyway. As soon as the door swung
shut the familiar sounds of retching echoed in the tiled bathroom, reaching
Sungmin’s ears, who simply grimaced and rolled over, pulling his pillow over
his head to try and block out the horrid sounds his brother was making.
A good ten minutes later, Kyuhyun reappeared in their shared bedroom, looking a
bit more sober and smelling a hell of a lot better than he did when he first
fell through the door when returning from his night out. Without saying
anything he pulled his shirt and pants off, throwing them across the sheets of
his bed, but instead of getting into his own bed, Kyuhyun crawled into
Sungmin’s. The older boy felt Sungmin’s skin raise in goosebumps as his own
cold flesh connect with the bare expanse of the youngers back. Sungmin whined
but didn’t say anything, rolling over so he was now looking up at the bed
invader, Sungmin pouted. “You’re cold, get out of my bed!”
Kyuhyun just chuckled and nuzzled closer to his younger brother, “Nope, I’m
cold and you’re warm so I’m gonna stay here and let you warm me up. Stop
wiggling, you’re annoying when you fidget like that.”
“Kyu-yah! Leave me alone! I want some sleep before tomorrow! If I look bad
tomorrow, I will kill you in your sleep!” Sungmin complained, half-heartedly
kicked the long pale leg that was threatening to curl around his own legs, and
tried once again to squirm out of Kyuhyun’s hold.
“Calm down Minnie, you’ll look fine tomorrow, like you do every day.” Kyuhyun
paused before looking down at his younger brother. “I… I haven’t got you
anything. I haven’t had the money. I’m really sorry little brother. I’ll make
it up to you, I’ll do your jobs around the house if you want?” Sungmin shuffled
closer to Kyuhyun’s larger frame, resting his head against his chest, pushing
Kyuhyun over so that the older boy was laid on his back with Sungmin half laid
across him, head nestled in the centre of Kyuhyun’s chest, listening to the
steady thumping of the heart underneath. He just laid and listened for a while
before finally replying.
“That’s okay. I haven’t got you anything either. Not really, nothing special
anyway.” Sungmin didn’t say anything about the obvious fact his older brother
did indeed have money and would still have money if he didn’t go out and blow
it all on booze, besides, Sungmin didn’t blame him, if he had the money he’d
probably go and drown away his memories too. Instead he yawn and smiled as his
listened to the soft soothing sound of Kyuhyun’s heart.
“What did you get me then?” Kyuhyun asked in a mock childish voice, arms
wrapping tighter around the others terribly slim frame.
Sungmin laughed, “I can’t tell you that, it’s not our birthday t- t-“ he broke
off, his words disappearing into a long wide yawn before muttering to himself
and carrying on, “till after midnight. Tell you what, I’ll give you your
present at one minute past midnight. Okay?”
Kyuhyun chuckled low in his throat “Okay then, if you can stay awake that long.
You’re falling asleep as you talk. Did Appa make you do a lot today?”
Sungmin shook his head “Nothing more than usual, I guess I’m just excited about
tomorrow”
“Lord I feel old compared to you. Here I am now turning twenty two and you‘re
just a kid. I’m an old man Minnie-yah, you’ll have to trade me in for a younger
model sooner rather than later.”
Sungmin laughed, poking Kyuhyun in the side, his words cut off by yet another
yawn so large this time he had tears running down his cheeks. Rubbing his eyes
he muttered, “You’re not old yet, you’ve got a long way to go before you’re old
like Appa. You’re still young and handsome.”
“Awww you think I’m handsome? At least someone does.” Kyuhyun chuckled, this
time sounding depressed and worn out. “Thank you. I think you’re gorgeous
yourself. You’re going to have all the ladies chasing you when you’re older, I
can promise you that.” Kyuhyun reached for Sungmin, pulling him up so his head
was resting in the crook of Kyuhyun’s arm, meaning they could both lay
comfortably and also so that the youngest could drift off without trapping
Kyuhyun underneath him.
Sungmin smiled happily, eyes slipping closed. His hand found Kyuhyun’s spare
one and tangled their fingers together. “Why would I want girls after me when I
have you Kyu-yah?” he mumbled, the end of his sentence barely understandable as
he finally fell asleep.
**
“Sungmin. Minnie-yah. Sungmin, wake up… Min… wake up!” Kyuhyun shook his
brother by the shoulder gently enough to wake him up without scaring the boy.
“Come on~” he whined, “Wake up!” Sungmin groaned and rolled over, pulling the
sheets over his head as he tried to curl up and ignore the pestering of the
other. Mumbling something not quite audible he laid still again. Laughing under
his breath Kyuhyun crawled over the small sleeping form of his brother,
hovering on all fours above him. “Minnie-yah, it‘s morning.” and Kyuhyun pulled
the sheets away completely, causing the cold air of the room to hit Sungmin
full force and effectively waking him up straight away. Whining Sungmin sat up
and glared at Kyuhyun through sleep blurred eyes.
“What do you want?” he grumbled, sounding thoroughly pissed off.
“Happy birthday Sungmin-ah. Ten years old, double figures at last!” Kyuhyun
beamed and leant forward to hug his younger brother, who was still trying to
understand what Kyuhyun was saying, his head still foggy with sleep.
“What? It’s… oh! It’s our birthday! Happy birthday Kyuhyun-ah!” Sungmin hugged
Kyuhyun back before freezing and frowning. “Hang on… you didn’t wake me up at
midnight. I still haven’t given you your present.”
Well, you were tired, I thought it’d be best to let you stay asleep. Besides, I
don’t deserve a present, I didn’t get you one remember?” but Sungmin just shook
his head.
“It doesn’t matter. It’s not like it cost me anything anyway.” Sungmin chewed
his bottom lip, nervous suddenly. “It’s not much… are you sure you want it? I
could always get you something better if you want?” Kyuhyun chuckled and
shuffled so he had Sungmin in his arms while he leant against the headboard of
the bed.
“I will love it no matter what it is. I swear.”
Sungmin met Kyuhyun’s eyes for a moment trying to work out if Kyuhyun was lying
or not and when he had deemed Kyuhyun as honest, he sighed nervously. “Okay..
Just… close your eyes.”
Kyuhyun sat in darkness, expecting Sungmin to move from his seat in his lap and
go get whatever it was. His eyes flew open in shocked surprise when he felt his
brother’s back side slide further into his lap and timid soft lips press
against his. Too stunned to react Kyuhyun sat still as stone as Sungmin kissed
him. He could see Sungmin’s closed eyes, his brother’s slender eyebrows arched
high, the younger boy’s pale skin flushed with nervousness and embarrassment.
Kyuhyun didn’t know what to do, his mind ran around in circles screaming at
him.
This was his brother, his incredibly young brother. There was twelve years
difference between them. Even if Sungmin hadn’t been his brother this would
have still been wrong, this was nothing short of paedophilic. The half of his
mind that wasn’t mentally beating him to death for not pushing his brother off
was sat dazed and repeating every sharp, frustratingly clear detail of the
situation. There was a light, comforting weight in his lap, sat so, so very
close to his crotch. There was slender delicate hands in his hair, gripping on
a little too tight, nails ever so slightly scratching at his scalp. The boy sat
on him now was beautiful, all porcelain skin, skinny frame and perfect gorgeous
features. Those lips so beautifully soft against his own, pressing with the
smallest hint of need, motionless against this own.
Kyuhyun felt his eyes slip shut, the room disappearing as his lids blacked
everything out. His hands shook as he brought them from the bed where they had
fallen in surprise and they wound themselves around Sungmin’s miniature waist,
hands fastening together and resting in a tangled ball of digits at the bottom
of the youngers back, holding him in place. He breathed in deep through his
nose and as he breathed back out again tentatively moved his lips against
Sungmin’s engaging a slightly harder kiss. He felt Sungmin gasp against his
lips, but the younger didn’t move away. Tentatively Kyuhyun moved their mouths
together more and more, taking his time to ease Sungmin into a deeper kiss.
After ten painfully long minutes Kyuhyun finally dared to brush his tongue
along Sungmin’s lower lip, a silent invitation to let the lithe muscle into the
others mouth. Sungmin jumped slightly but met his brothers tongue with his own,
obviously unsure as to what to do. But Kyuhyun led the kiss, applying slightly
more pressure to the kiss, teaching Sungmin’s tongue how to dance.
Another five minutes later Sungmin was confidently kissing Kyuhyun, swapping
from open mouthed to closed and slight teasing of tongue. Kyuhyun felt Sungmin
shuffle closer to him, chests pressed close together, one of Sungmin’s hands
cupping Kyuhyun’s cheek while the other laid at the back of Kyuhyun‘s neck,
Kyuhyun’s own hands either side of Sungmin’s tiny hips, thumbs moving in small
soothing circles, massaging just above the sharp curve of the young boy’s
hipbones, the smooth curve of Sungmin’s backside sat atop Kyuhyun’s slowly
stirring cock. Sungmin broke the kiss with a gasp when Kyuhyun’s hands smoothed
along his sides, stroking Sungmin’s small figure with just enough weight to his
touch to make the movement a little less than innocent. The youngest opened his
mouth to say something but changed his mind last minute and instead nuzzled
into the crook of Kyuhyun’s neck.
“If… If Appa caught us… like we were just now… we’d get in trouble wouldn’t
we?” Sungmin whispered after a while, not moving from his place on Kyuhyun’s
shoulder, breathing in the other’s scent.
“I would but you wouldn’t, nobody would blame you or tell you off.” Kyuhyun
sighed.
“That’s not fair. Why wouldn’t I get in trouble? I wouldn’t let you take all
the trouble for it.”
“You’re too young to understand Minnie-yah. You’re too young and I’m too old, I
should know better. This.. This is wrong, really, really wrong. You’re my
brother, we’re related, it’s so so wrong. If anyone knew about what just
happened I’d get locked away.”
“…Oh.”
“But I liked your present very much. I’ll always remember it, I promise.”
Sungmin squeaked and moved so he could glare at Kyuhyun through narrowed eyes,
“You liked it?? Really, you‘re not lying?” Kyuhyun nodded sincerely, trying to
laugh at his brothers behaviour. Sungmin studied him for a second then dived
for his shoulder again. Burying his face again he mumbled “Good. I liked it
too.”
After a comfortable silence, Kyuhyun cleared his throat before almost nervously
asking, “H-Hey… Sungmin-ah.. Can I have another present?”
Sungmin moved from his place on the others shoulder, smiling. “Sure you can.”
Kyuhyun leant in, brushing his lips up against Sungmin’s before planting his
kiss more firmly, pushing against Sungmin’s mouth. Sungmin gasped at the
pressure, mouth opening slightly letting the kiss fall straight into an open
mouthed battle. Kyuhyun’s hands gripped tight onto Sungmin’s hips, pulling the
boy flush against his body, Kyuhyun gasping himself at the friction against his
cock the movement had made.
Sungmin squeaked slightly at the feel of something hard underneath him, his
brothers hips subconsciously rocking up against him. Tying his hands into
Kyuhyun’s hair Sungmin pulled the older boy forward against him, the kiss
turning into something deep and almost suffocating hot. Sungmin had no idea
what he was doing, before now he’d never kissed anyone before, but Kyuhyun
seemed to know what to do so Sungmin let himself fall into submission. He
trusted Kyuhyun and was more than willing to let the older boy do as he liked.
The kiss was desperate and messy, Kyuhyun was moaning as he repeatedly abused
Sungmin’s lips, missing every now and then in his haste, catching the edges of
the smaller mouth. Kyuhyun pulled on Sungmin’s hips, throwing sense and logic
out the window, the feel of his brothers backside against his crotch making him
growl, the kiss getting frantic.
Sungmin squeaked, trying to shuffle backwards while Kyuhyun rocked him. This
was starting to feel slightly wrong. He loved his brother, loved him
unconditionally. But… what Kyuhyun was doing to him now was making him all hot
and bothered and not entirely comfortable. Managing to lean his head back,
Kyuhyun’s mouth attaching to his neck, biting softly and sucking at the hurts
he caught the odd glance at his brothers face. He looked so happy. Blissful
almost. Sungmin hesitated. He hadn’t seen Kyuhyun this happy in a long while.
If this made him happy, whatever it was, Sungmin should go ahead with it.
Kyuhyun groaned, running his lips along the stretch of Sungmin’s neck. His
brother smelt like pure heaven, young and morning fresh. This was so
unbelievably wrong but felt, oh so right. Grabbing Sungmin by the waist he
moved the younger, tipping him till he laid down on the bed, hair fanned out
behind him looking up at him with large, glassy surprised eyes. There was a
whisper of a noise on his lips, shocked that his brother was still able to move
him about like a small child. Nervously Sungmin raised his quivering hands up,
reaching up for Kyuhyun. Smiling Kyuhyun crawled over him, dropping down so
that his elbows were either side of the youngers head, lowering his own till
their lips met again.
“I want to make you feel good… I want to feel good. Is that okay Minnie-yah?”
Kyuhyun breathed, panting slightly. Sungmin nodded, Kyuhyun felt weak as he
kissed him again.
Straddling the boy, Kyuhyun looked down, soft smirk dancing on his lips as his
brother squirmed underneath his wandering eyes, uncomfortable with the new
attention. He was dragging the palms of his hands up and down the undeveloped
torso, feeling the ripple of ribs beneath the sleep shirt. Keeping steady eye
contact with Sungmin’s chocolate sweet eyes, Kyuhyun’s hands found the buttons
on the shirt, slowly popping each undone till he had the shirt laid open, the
younger boy exposed. Spotting a pout on Sungmin’s lips, Kyuhyun pulled his own
shirt off over his head.
“There, better?” He asked with teasing sarcasm. Sungmin nodded happily.
Kyuhyun leant back down for a deep kiss, tracing his brothers mouth with his
tongue, tasting all of him. Inspired, Kyuhyun kissed bruised lips one last
time, kissing the boys forehead before shuffling down and kissing underneath
the younger’s chin, forcing the boy to arch his neck. Sungmin whined but
Kyuhyun shushed him, kissing his Adam’s apple, then the dip at the bottom of
Sungmin’s neck where his collarbones met. Planting a kiss on Sungmin’s chest
Kyuhyun’s mouth found a nipple, nipping and sucking the bud into hardness,
drinking in the gasps and shocked whines melting from the younger’s lips.
Continuing on down his brother’s body, flicking his tongue into Sungmin’s navel
laughing when Sungmin cried out with a cry of ‘Oh!’ sounding incredibly
surprised at the pleasurable sensation. Kyuhyun carried on down, distracting
the younger with kisses and tiny bites as he slipped Sungmin out of his pyjama
bottoms. Sungmin didn’t realise he was entirely naked until hot breath dance
over his half hardening member. With a chocked scream Sungmin bolted up right,
pushing Kyuhyun away.
“I… I… this. Is … dirty and weird. Kyuhyunnie hyung I don’t... think I can…”
Sungmin trailed off, hand coming over to cover his crotch, a hot embarrassed
flush darkening his cheeks.
Kyuhyun bit his lower lip. “Minnie-yah… I’m not going to hurt you… it’ll feel…
wonderful. I promise. Let me show you? Please?” Kyuhyun watched nervously as
Sungmin visibly chewed it over in his head, feeling guilty for dropping his
face into to a sad pout when Sungmin dropped his head and nodded feverishly
though nerves and obvious uncertainty.
“It’s going to feel good… right? Wonderful?” he whispered.
Kyuhyun nodded, crawling forward, to capture the youngers mouth briefly before
pushing him down again, returning down to Sungmin’s lower half, hands running
along milky white thighs as he kissed along the crease of the boys hips, just
along where leg met hip. Sungmin squirmed and gasped as hypersensitive skin was
teased, breath hitching, he was so nervous and had no idea what Kyuhyun was
doing or wanted to do.
Kyuhyun’s mouth finally reached Sungmin’s member, making sure his hands were
warm before carefully wrapping five long digits around the immature length,
spare hand coming up to hold Sungmin down as the younger boy yelled and went to
sit up again before falling back by himself with a long high whimper. Kyuhyun
closed his fist around the hot flesh, slowly beginning to pump the half there
erection into full standing, wrapping his lips around the tip to help,
carefully sucking on the velvety skin.
Sungmin’s blood was acid burning in his veins but it felt like nothing he’d
experienced before. It was like he was feeling the best he’d ever been made to
feel and the most uncomfortable all at once. It was so strange and true to his
brothers words so wonderful.
Kyuhyun slipped his mouth away from Sungmin’s member, keeping his hand in
motion. Bringing his other hand down Kyuhyun sucked viscously on his own
fingers, wetting them as much as possible, as fast as he could. He carefully
nudged Sungmin’s left further apart, before carefully circling the boys
entrance with a single digit before swiftly pushing it in down to the knuckle.
Sungmin yelled and jolted violently  scrabbling to try and sit up but Kyuhyun
held him down.
“Shhh, Minnie-yah, calm down. It’s okay. I promise. It’s okay.”
“I-It hurts a-and f-feels weird h-hyung. Take it o-out p-please.” Sungmin
sobbed, though despite his words his breath hitched slightly as Kyuhyun slowly
slid the finger out and carefully pushed it back in again.
“Give it time, It’ll feel better.” Kyuhyun mumbled through mildly gritted
teeth. He edged another finger in, loosening up the youngers tight entrance.
Through nothing but sheer determination, Kyuhyun finally had four fingers
working inside Sungmin, the younger boy’s complaints and pleas long forgotten
as the child gasped and bucked his hips, trying to impale himself deeper on
Kyuhyun’s long fingers, begging for the elder to do something.
Kyuhyun pulled his fingers out with a sad groan from Sungmin before kissing the
younger quickly. Kyuhyun jumped off the bed, darting over to his half the room,
rummaging madly through his drawers before cheering in triumph and diving back
on the bed, small almost empty bottle of cheap lube. Landing a quick peck on
Sungmin’s lips, Kyuhyun pushed off his own pants and underwear .
“K-Kyuhyunnie-yah, what are y-you doing?” Sungmin breathed, confused and
aroused.
“Don’t - don’t worry.” Kyuhyun slicked himself up with the last of the lube,
hissing at the contact of cool slick liquid. Crawling over Sungmin, kissing him
again Kyuhyun hitched up the youngers legs, settling between the spread thighs.
“This is going to feel… it’s going to hurt at first. But it’ll get better,
it’ll feel wonderful, remember?” Kyuhyun breathed, hot against Sungmin’s ear,
not giving the younger boy time to answer before positioning himself at his
entrance and carefully pushing in, edging in slowly.
Sungmin screamed at the intrusion, hot tears slipping down his cheeks. He was
too small, too young for this, Kyuhyun’s slender fingers not enough to prepare
him with. Kyuhyun kissed the tears, mumbling breathless reassurances as his
hips kept moving, seating himself fully inside the younger.
Everything was so loud and so quiet all at once, it was threatening to give him
headache. He felt so exposed, so dirty and so wrong. He could feel his heart
swelling and constricting as blood thumped through his veins, keeping him
alive. Kyuhyun held himself steady, allowing Sungmin to adjust. Sungmin gulped
in the stifling air as he tried to ease off the pain. Their eyes slowly opened,
gazes met and both brothers gave a small uncomfortable smile which felt more
like a grimace on the lips.
Kyuhyun lent down and pressed his lips against Sungmin’s, the shift making the
younger gasp and involuntarily buck. Kyuhyun pulled back, and then pushed in
forward again. Carrying on as each thrust got a louder cry of approval and a
less of a whine. Kyuhyun shuddered, steadily losing control as the younger boys
walls shuddered around him. It had been so long since Kyuhyun had a decent
chance to release, confined to lazily jerking off for the last few months. He
wasn’t going to last long with Sungmin laid out underneath him like this.
Kyuhyun heard himself muttering a string of curses, heart thundering in his
chest he kept going, faster and faster, Kyuhyun’s fingertips gripping hard onto
sweaty skin.
There was a familiar coil tightening somewhere in his lower regions, Kyuhyun’s
hips fell sporadic and shuddered out of time, with a low hoarse cry the coil
snapped and he came, vision disappearing beneath his eyelids as he collapsed
forward, arms coming down to catch himself automatically.
Sungmin yelped as Kyuhyun fell, squirming at the strange and slightly sickening
feeling of having the older come inside him. He shuffled trying to hold in the
gasps the movement caused their still connected bodies. “Kyu… hyung, please.”
Sungmin bucked his hips feebly, his own arousal still very much present.
Kyuhyun just opened his eyes and looked down at him. Sungmin felt those pale
fingers curl around his wrist and guide his hand down to the youngers member
and force his own small had to wrap around it.
“Do it yourself Minnie, I want to see you do it.”
“But…”
“I said, do it.” Kyuhyun snapped, leaning back to pull out and lean against the
wall, eyes trained on his younger brother.
Sungmin swallowed thickly, unsure as to what to do so he let his instincts take
over. He let his head drop back and his eyes close, not wanting to see Kyuhyun
looking at him with such cold and greedy eyes. Fighting off the urge to cry
Sungmin squeezed his hand around himself, bucking at the wonderful sensation.
He tried it again, this time sliding his shaking fist carefully down his
length. Sungmin learnt what to do quickly enough and just went by what felt
right, and kept going until a curious feeling filled him. It was almost like he
needed to go pee but somehow… different.
“H-hyung I- don’t… I don’t…”
“Keep going, it’s alright.”
Sungmin nodded and kept going, wondering when his fist had started to move
faster. With a high, confused cry Sungmin came and his body fell slack into the
sheets. He instantly began crying, hot tears burning and sliding down his
cheeks. “Kyu-yah, please,” he whimpered, holding his arms out to his older
brother. “please. Come here.”
Kyuhyun crawled forward, unsure. He was already regretting this and just wanted
to leave. He laid down next to Sungmin and half-heartedly curled an arm around
the youngers waist.
“Shh. It’s alright.”
***** Chew *****
Chapter Summary
     Fun fact, I used this in my A Level art exam as part of my final
     piece.
Donghae had this really weird habit, Henry had never really paid attention to
it before. Even since they were really little, Donghae used to eat Henry’s
fingers. Or his toys. Or his pens, whatever he could get his mouth around.
Donghae loved chewing, tasting, licking and kissing things. It was no wonder
that at the tender age of fourteen he’d turned around to Henry, looking more
serious than he had ever done before and said in a threateningly important
tone, “Henry-yah. I think I’m gay.” Henry had just blinked and asked where the
confession had come from. Donghae pointed towards his father’s computer screen
where they were sneakily watching porn in the middle of the night and
whispered, “Because I want to do what that girls doing… I… I want to do it to
you Henry-yah,” Henry had raised his eyebrows, looked back at the screen to
check what the enormously busty blonde was doing and without even thinking
said, “Sure. Go for it.” Donghae had to pounce on him with a wet, slobbery kiss
to distract him from the blow job on the screen. Somehow, from that first,
failed attempt at sexual intimacy, when Henry accidentally came on Donghae’s
cheek, the pair fell into a relationship, that five years later, was still as
strong as ever. Donghae still chews things, the boys oral fixation is still as
potent as ever and Henry’s aim had got significantly better.
It was Christmas break, the pair were cuddled up together in Donghae’s single
bed, watching the crappy television spew out the same Christmas song it had
been playing for the last three days. Henry sat with his back against the wall
with Donghae between his legs, the older boys back resting against Henry’s
chest. Henrys hands had initially been holding onto Donghae’s, fingers
intertwined together in a warm, comfortable knot but inevitably, Donghae’s
mouth got lonely and without the pair of them realising Donghae had slipped
Henrys fingers in between his lips and was gently chewing on them. It wasn’t
until Donghae had three of his fingers in his mouth and the older boy had
switched from innocently chewing on them to sucking them into his mouth slowly,
his tongue playing between the digits, that Henry noticed. With a quiet groan
he tugged his fingers away from those beautiful lips, leaning down and over for
a kiss before mumbling, “Not now love, I’m knackered. Later though.”
Donghae pouted, trying his best puppy eyes, fluttering his eyelashes up at his
boyfriend, “Please~?” he whined, hand grabbing for Henry’s fingers again.
Laughing Henry dodged the others hand and smacked him lightly around the head.
“No, I can’t be bothered to move, never mind deal with a horny Donghae.”
Donghae shifted, turning round, sitting on his knees and leaning into towards
Henry, “How about I deal with you then? Come on~” he all but whined, “it’ll be
worth it, you know it will.”
Henry gave his best attempt at an please-don’t-push-me stare, but the other boy
had some sort of talent at whining. Henry blamed those gorgeous sparkling and
far away eyes. With an exaggerated sigh Henry muttered “Okay, fine.” and pulled
the older boy forward, his own hands cupping the elders cheeks as their lips
met in a slow and tender kiss. It was an unwritten rule they had, sex always
started with that kiss. Donghae leaned in, brushing his lips against Henrys,
delighting in the electric shiver that ran through the younger boy at the
contact. Feeling his eyes slip shut he pressed a little harder, building the
kiss up tenderly. Henry let out a tiny whimper, almost silently and pushed back
against the others lips, letting Donghae’s heat warm him up slowly, spreading
through him like fire, breathing life into him. The older boy never seemed to
fail to set his fingertips tingling, his toes curling and his heartbeat
quicken, Henry smiled as he slid his hands around Donghae’s neck, pulling the
boy closer. Donghae pulled back with a small satisfied giggle.
“You know for someone who said no just a second ago, you’re awfully easy to
convince.”
Henry hit him around the head. “Shut up and kiss me again idiot.” Donghae
complied with a grin. Henry pushed back eagerly, too comfortable with the other
boy to be embarrassed at the soft whine humming in his throat when Donghae’s
tongue brushed his lower lip, pressing past the crease to tease Henry’s tongue
which came to meet his. Donghae drew the lithe muscles back, drawing Henry’s
own into his mouth, he hummed happily and gave Henry’s tongue a quick suck
before letting it free again and giving Henry a chance to breathe.
Henry growled and pushed Donghae backwards, pressing Donghae down into the
mattress. There was hands in hair, hands stroking down arching spines, hands
sneaking under clothes and hands cupping cheeks to better angle the desperate
kisses. Donghae tried twice to break away but only on the third attempt did he
manage to hold Henry back, with a breathless chuckle. “I thought I was meant to
be dealing with you, this is feeling a little backwards.”
Henry nuzzled into Donghae’s neck, forcing the elder to tip his chin and allow
his mouth access. Henry kissed against the thundering pulse and gave his own,
deep and aroused giggle straight into Donghae’s ear, “Are you complaining?”
Donghae groaned, hips rising up to try and find Henry’s - looking for friction.
When Henry held him down and sat back up and away from Donghae, Donghae
followed, pushing Henry’s hands from his hips. He grinned, “Not complaining,
no. But I don’t think you’re going to complain either.” The little room that
the bed allowed mean that Donghae had Henry sat up, back pressed against the
wall, backside sat on the pillows and Donghae knelt between eagerly spread
legs.
Donghae pushed his lips back up against Henry’s, drinking in the younger males
keens. Henry’s fingers clutched at the elders t-shirt, pulling him forward
before changing his mind and trying to tug the fabric up and off. Donghae broke
the kiss laughing, helping Henry pull the item off, deciding to remove Henry’s
own jumper and t-shirt at the same time. Pulling Henry towards him, Donghae sat
the Canadian in his lap, hands lacing into the younger boys hair and pulling
him down for another kiss. Henry happily complied, savouring each tantalising
brush of their chests as they panted, his tiredness long since forgotten.
Henry bit down softly on Donghae’s full lower lip and tugged. The older male
groaned and gripped hard on to the younger, flexible hips of his partner. He
chased Henry’s lips with his own, breathing in each of the ragged and desperate
breaths that were leaving those pretty parted lips. Donghae fell backwards
again, pulling Henry with him, the pair of them grinding desperately, hips
snapping back and forth to gain a little fraction, to find satisfaction.
Trembling hands pulled away at the last of their clothes, peeling off sweat
slick underwear to allow for flesh on flesh contact. The air filled with a
harmony of groans and pants, as Henry suffocated the elder best he could with
his lips, teeth and tongue. Donghae’s hands slipped up strong, tense thighs and
his fingertips danced over the younger boys backside, grinning into the
breathless barrage of kisses when Henry swore desperately, almost tearful at
the feel and bucked sharply. The burning need for air forced Henry’s mouth to
leave Donghae’s so instead the younger trailed his lips down and across the
elders jaw line, pausing to bite down on a tender earlobe before finding
desperate purchase on the pulse point on Donghae’s neck, making the older weak
and needy.
Donghae’s hands, shaking now, brushed up the others spine before harshly
dragging blunt, chewed nails down the slick skin. Henry swore and sat up, sat
straddled across Donghae’s naked hips. He reached out and over to the bedside
table, hands scrabbling furiously to find a condom and lube. Below him Donghae
set up a tantalisingly slow rhythm, hips rocking the pair of them carefully
back and forth, friction of flesh on flesh building up tension in each of their
lower abdomens beautifully.
Henry dropped back don, kissing Donghae sloppily and wetly, hands fumbling to
unwrap the condom and push it down across the elders hot flesh. Donghae’s head
snapped back and he groaned at the contact, hips moving in a plea for more
attention. Henry chuckled a little too breathlessly and ran his fist along the
hardened flesh, savouring the hot and heavy feel of the man he loved in his
hand.
“P- please. Henry-yah… Henry… please…” Donghae begged hips following each
movement of the younger’s hand.
Henry lifted his own hips, own fingers suddenly slick with lubricant and
disappearing between his own legs. Henry’s eyes flickered to meet Donghae’s so
that the elder could watch the gleam shine over in his partners eyes as he
prepared himself, the sounds of slick skin sliding along slick skin driving the
pair of them mad. Henry’s previously absent hand reappeared and Henry, once
again, sat up. He gripped carefully at Donghae’s member and guided the elder
into his tight heat.
A garbled mash of deep moans reverberated across the ceiling. They were used to
this feeling, this was something they were so accustomed to that they craved
it. But somehow the first initial stretch, the beginning of it all, still
managed to leave them gulping down air and shivering at the intensity of the
feeling. Donghae’s hands fastened around Henry’s hips, holding the younger boy
steady, anchoring down their sanity and silently telling him that it as okay,
he was there and he loved him.
Henry gingerly lowered himself down, still connected and trembling almost
violently at the feeling. He panted heavy across Donghae’s lips, it took a
moment for Donghae to realise the younger man was speaking. “Hy- D- Donghae-
Donghae… hyung… love… you. Love you.” Donghae whispered his returned feelings,
lips brushing tenderly before parting as Henry pushed up, moaning as the
movement brushed against the bundle of nerves within him. Donghae lifted Henry
up by his hips and then pulled him back down again, repeating the action until
the pair had established a hurried pace. With every counter movement Henry’s
breath caught and he made a small, high noise in the back of his throat.
Donghae let out a slow, low groan and with tremendous effort, switched their
positions without pulling out.
Back now glued against the mattress, the sheets rising to stick to his soaked
skin, Henry wrapped his legs around Donghae’s waist, heels digging into the
elders lower back to make him drive into him faster and deeper. Donghae dropped
down above Henry, arms holding him up, mouths marred together as the pair of
them felt their completion nearing. Henry’s hand came up to smack Donghae half-
heartedly on the arm, the elder realising he was neglecting the younger’s own
 aching need. With practiced ease Donghae balanced his weight on one hand,
using the motion of his hips to keep him level and stop him from falling on top
of the younger, Donghae’s spare hand slipping down Henry’s panting body to curl
around the other’s heated member. Henry threw his head back with a loud call of
appreciation as Donghae matched the pace of his hips.
The pair remained ever in motion, Henry’s arms slung around Donghae’s neck and
shoulders, securing him against the older body as the intense heat built up,
Donghae kissed messily along Henry’s neck and cheeks, hips faltering and moving
sporadically as his heart thundered in his ears and his chest and he was so
close to finishing. Henry cried out, the double stimulus of being full and of
being touched overwhelming him and becoming his undoing. He shook against
Donghae, the elders name dripping from his lips as he rode out his completion.
The fluttering of Henry’s inner walls as the younger came was too much pressure
and sensation of Donghae to take and he pushed deep for the final few
movements, finishing with a loud, wordless moan. Falling on top of the younger
boy, Donghae felt his heart hammering in his chest and could feel Henry’s
drumming away next to his. With a lazy kiss that missed the younger boys lips
Donghae rolled off to a side, fingers crawling to tie in with Henry’.
***** Kiss *****
Kyuhyun hummed under his breath as he tapped his foot against the edge of his
bed. He was bored, it was the summer holidays and he had nothing to do. His
parents were away at his grandmothers, she’d fallen sick and needed around the
clock care. Promising that he would be perfectly fine by himself, Kyuhyun all
but pushed his parents out of the front door and into their car, promising to
call them every day and let them know if he wanted them to come back. He had no
brothers or sisters, so that ruled any siblings out as a source of
entertainment. He didn’t have any friends at school, or at least, none he was
close enough to invite over to his house. The television had become annoying
background noise, his laptop had started to give him headache, this games had
been played to death and completed several times over and he wasn’t one for
going out. With a heavy and annoyed sigh he threw himself backwards across the
sheets. If only he had a friend, the whole ordeal would be bearable.
If he had a friend, they’d be able to stay up all night challenging each other
on the games console or set fire to the kitchen as they attempted to make food.
He’d have someone to talk to. Kyuhyun was a little unsettled that he was
craving friendship, usually, while surrounded by people he’d be quite happy to
ignore them all and just carry on with his life in solitude. But now that all
the people had been taken out and he was literally all alone, Kyuhyun didn’t
have anyone to ignore. Glancing over at the digital clock on the bedside
cabinet Kyuhyun pulled himself into bed properly. It was well past midnight, he
really ought to get some sleep. Settling back into the pillows he tried
thinking about what kind of a friend he’d have, in an ideal world. Kyuhyun had
no interest in girls, they were too loud and too fussy so his friend would have
to be a boy. He’d be quiet, but not boring, he’d have to have an interesting
streak in him or else what would the point be? Bringing his hands up behind his
head Kyuhyun started up at the ceiling, getting carried away with his thinking.
It’d be cool to have a foreign friend, someone he could understand but most
other people wouldn’t. Aside from Korean Kyuhyun knew a fair bit of Mandarin,
so his friend would have to be Chinese. He’d be an outcast like himself, so
they’d have something in common at least.
His eyes slipped closed as his imagination boomed, his friend would have to
live close by so he could see him a lot outside of school. At times like this,
his friends parents would have no problem letting him stay over at Kyuhyun’s
house to keep him company for the full time his parents were gone. Kyuhyun
wasn’t much of a cook, so his friend would be able to cook, and would be quite
happy to do so. They could sit in the kitchen and talk while his friend cooked.
It’d be great, Kyuhyun smiled to himself. His friend would be his friend, and
no one else’s. Drifting off to sleep Kyuhyun’s mind soared while his body
rested.
“Kyuhyun-ah! Hey, Kyuhyun-ah! Wait for me! Hey, where do you think you were
running off to eh?”
Kyuhyun turned around, looking back for the body to accompany the voice. He
felt his face break out into a grin when he spotted his friend running up to
him.
“Where do you think you were going by yourself? I’ll come with you, keep you
company.” his friend smiled, Kyuhyun felt himself heat up with embarrassment
when he noticed he had a gorgeous smile. Kyuhyun blinked and shuffled backwards
with a small mumble when he realised that his friend was mere inches from his
face. Dropping his gaze he turned to keep walking before stopping dead when a
hand wrapped around his wrist with a quiet murmur of his name, in slow motion
Kyuhyun turned around, looking back at his friend. Next thing he knew his eyes
were slipping closed when lips met his own and his friend kissed him with a
beautiful gentle pressure.
Kyuhyun woke up slowly, not wanting to open his eyes. The dream had been so
good, he couldn’t remember most of it, but the parts he could remember, that
kiss, had been brilliant and he wanted nothing more than to fall back asleep
and carry on the dream. Letting himself lay in the warmth of his sheets Kyuhyun
strained to remember what his friend had looked like. He could remember those
deep, come hither eyes that threatened to make him blush. He could vividly see
the others mouth, gorgeous pearly whites and soft kissable lips. There hadn’t
been much of a height difference, he couldn’t recall who was taller. But aside
from that, Kyuhyun couldn’t remember anything else. Miserable he swung his legs
out of bed, the summer heat too much to let him stay wrapped in sheets.
Pattering sleepily through the corridors Kyuhyun stripped off his sleeping gear
before wandering into the bathroom and setting a cold shower, stepping under
the water Kyuhyun gasped as the temperature instantly washed away any traces of
sleepiness. Ruffling his hands through his hair in a lazy attempt to wash it,
Kyuhyun shook the water from his eyes while turning the water off. Leaning
against the tiled wall Kyuhyun tried to remember his friends name but he
couldn’t remember it for the life of him.
Fully dressed and sat at the breakfast bar Kyuhyun chewed his way through his
cereal, which was steadily getting soggier. But Kyuhyun didn’t notice the
deterioration of his Corn Flakes, he was too distracted by remembering the boys
mouth against his own. He’d never thought about his sexuality before… sure he
had no interest in girls, but he’d never had his attention caught by any guys
either. Disposing his bowl in the sink without bothering to wash it Kyuhyun
made his way back to his bedroom, retrieving his laptop before going to sprawl
across the sofa in the living room. Flicking the lid up he waited for the
machine to start up, bashing his password in half way through while he carried
on considering the dream. Not wanting to jump ahead of himself before he had
any actual real life experience, Kyuhyun was seriously debating the
possibilities of him being gay. Thinking over the last few years of his teenage
life, he recalled being more interested in male actors, singers and
acquaintances. Women had never really much of a part in his life. Kyuhyun tried
to think of men he knew of, trying to consider if he found them attractive.
Struggling due to his lack of interest in popular culture he clicked open the
internet and tried searching for popular boy bands and famous men. Scrolling
though pages and pages of popular celebrity men, Kyuhyun discovered two things:
one, he was never having plastic surgery. Quite frankly the results were
terrifying and did not make anyone more attractive, just made them look like
fake. And two, he was most defiantly gay. He’d been through tonnes of internet
sites, watched mountains of music videos and discovered that his pictures
folder had more use than just for saving pictures of up and coming game
characters. Kyuhyun felt a little bit embarrassed when at dinnertime while
slurping up microwavable noodles he was flicking though the pictures he’d
saved. He had over fifty folders of separate boy bands, singers, actors,
television presenters and general famous men. All of which were men he’d
discovered that he found unbelievably attractive. He’d failed to find a single
woman he’d consider kissing, never mind sleeping with. So he was either
incredibly picky and bisexual or just plain gay. Preferring the less
complicated side of it, Kyuhyun sat back, microwave noodles in hand slightly
stunned at how easily he’d decided something as important as his sexuality.
With no one to share the news with Kyuhyun simply started up an online game,
ready to loose himself for a few hours.
Blinking up from the laptop screen Kyuhyun half wondered when it had gotten so
dark. Standing up on numb legs he stumbled over to the light switch, flicking
it over to ‘on’ shielding his eyes from the bright light. Turning around he
aimed for the kitchen, hungry again. However as his hand came up to the kitchen
light switch he paused with a frown, he was certain he saw something or someone
move in the dark shadows of the kitchen. “Who’s there?” when there was no reply
and no movements Kyuhyun clicked the lights into life. Glancing over the whole
room Kyuhyun shook his head putting it down to paranoia and too much gaming.
Kyuhyun was jumpy the rest of the night and kept seeing movement’s out the
corner of his eye. After checking gall the doors and windows were closed and
that he was completely alone in the house, Kyuhyun went to bed, tense and
certain he wouldn’t sleep at all. Within moments he had drifted off, mind once
again buzzing.
He was sat in the kitchen. Kyuhyun couldn’t remember why he was in the kitchen,
or why he was sat at the breakfast bar. Looking up when he heard a clatter he
saw his friend picking a bowl up off from the floor. That gorgeous smile split
the others face.
“Sorry, I’m still half asleep.” there was a tense pause. “You’re… quiet.” His
friend let out a heavy sigh, and looked at the floor, seemingly unable to look
at Kyuhyun “Listen… Kyuhyun-ah… I knew I shouldn’t have… I force you to, I
understand. You weren’t ready. We’ve not known each other long and I just let
us… um… fall into bed like that… It was careless.” His friend placed the bowl
in the sink with a heavy sigh. Kyuhyun only just noticed the other didn’t have
a shirt on. Looking down, he saw that he didn’t either. He had no idea what the
other boy was talking about but his mouth opened of its own accord and answered
for him.
“Geng… hyung. You’re making it sound like you took advantage of me. You didn’t.
I wanted you to… I wanted us to… I wanted to do it. We haven’t known each other
long, but I feel like I’ve known you  my whole life. I’m glad we,” he felt
himself take a steadying breath, “I’m glad we had sex. And I want you to stay.”
The other boy, Geng, looked back at him, seeming unsure for a moment before
smiling awkwardly. “Guess what?” He said quietly, with a little smirk.
“What?” they were stood up now, the kitchen had disappeared. The room looked
like the living room, if only Kyuhyun was paying attention to his surroundings.
“I want to stay. Don’t think I ever want to leave.” Geng took a step closer to
Kyuhyun. He was almost purring with every word he spoke. “I want to get to know
you better Kyuhyun-ah. Every-” Geng was now right in front of him, one hand out
stretched and resting on Kyuhyun’s chest. “-last-” Geng’s hand skated lower
down his chest, brushing down his abdomen, “-inch-” warm fingers curled around
the bulge in Kyuhyun’s pants, that Kyuhyun didn’t know existed until those
fingers squeezed lightly, drawing a gasp from Kyuhyun, “-of you.” And Geng
kissed him, Kyuhyun felt himself melt completely into it, throwing his arms
over Geng’s shoulders, fingers raking into the other’s hair and gabbing on
tight, tongue darting boldly to dance with the Chinese one.
Kyuhyun woke up breathless, sat up and ready to bolt. The dream had felt so
real. He could still feel, he realised with a deep shudder, the shadow of those
strong fingers pressing onto him. He could almost taste the other in his mouth.
Geng. The boy from the dream had a name.
Kyuhyun fell down on to his back, panting slightly. He was hard, from the
memory of the dream. Automatically, Kyuhyun slipped a hand down under the
covers and into the waistband of his pants. With a shuddering breath, his cold
fingers wrapped slowly around his hot, half-awake length. Vivid feelings and
visions flashed by him from the dream. Geng. Geng’s hands, Geng’s tongue,
Geng’s body and breath on his lips. His fist tightened around himself, the pace
increased and Kyuhyun allowed himself to let out a loud gasp.  He lost himself
in the fantasy. He came once, still the images remained, he came twice, three,
four times. Exhausted, dirty and close to tears Kyuhyun fell asleep.
Kyuhyun woke up, half aware he wasn’t alone. Geng was asleep next to him, chest
rising and falling with every deep, sleepy breath he took. Kyuhyun smiled. He
wasn’t the kind of person to get clingy or want attention, but Kyuhyun found
himself shuffling across to rest his head on Geng’s chest. Kyuhyun’s eye’s
fluttered shut as he tuned out and listened to the rapid, carefully paced
heartbeat underneath his ear. He hummed quietly. He couldn’t remember ever
feeling so content.
He laid there for about an hour, enjoying the quiet company. Beneath him Geng
shuffled and tried to roll over before giving up and falling back into peaceful
sleep. Kyuhyun smiled. This felt good. He’s never had company like this,
intimacy so easy and perfect. He nuzzled down into the dip of Geng’s chest,
half considering going back to sleep.
Underneath the covers, Kyuhyun brought his hand up with the intention of
curling his arm around the other’s waist. But half way up his fingers brushed
past something unmistakable. Kyuhyun froze and a wicked smile pulled at his
lips. Slowly and carefully as to not wake the other, older boy up, Kyuhyun
slipped down, head vanishing under the covers. They were both naked, this
seemed to make sense to him even though he had no idea what happened before he
fell asleep. It didn’t matter. Kyuhyun saw what he had so innocently found.
Geng was hard, whatever the Chinese boy was dreaming about, he seemed to be
enjoying it.
Moving slowly and quietly Kyuhyun carefully spread Geng’s legs as far as he
dare, and settled awkwardly between them. Balanced on the edge of his elbow and
one of his hands Kyuhyun held his breath as he lowered his head, nose nuzzling
into the crease where Geng’s delicious full thigh met flexible hips. Above him,
in the world outside of covers and hot flesh Geng groaned in his sleep, he
shuffled and his hard length bumped against Kyuhyun’s cheek.
Stifling a snigger, Kyuhyun turned his head and pressed an open mouthed kiss
against the hot flesh of Geng’s cock. A loud gasp echoed though the room,
Kyuhyun took his chance and slipped his mouth over the head of Geng’s length
just as Geng muttered his name sleepily with an audible trace of frustration.
Kyuhyun ignored him and tried to take more into his mouth, eyes closing as he
concentrated on not choking. He didn’t seem to have much experience at this.
Geng was defiantly awake now, hands were trying to find Kyuhyun’s hair,
fumbling blindly under the sheets. Kyuhyun heard his own name slipping through
the air again. He was sure it was some form of narcissism to love hearing his
own name said like that, but it didn’t matter right now. Kyuhyun allowed his
tongue to lay against the hot skin as best he could. The heavy weight and
warmth of Geng’s cock in his mouth was something he wasn’t used to, he wasn’t
sure what to do, or how to do it. So he tried to listen and feel for signs he
was doing it right. He pressed down a little further till his throat tried to
close up and reject the foreign object. Coming up slightly, Kyuhyun put his
attention back to trying to move his tongue. This went a lot better. The moment
his tongue flicked against the skin, Geng swore and bucked, so Kyuhyun did it
again, trying to move his head as he did so, trying to copy the obscene bobbing
motion he’d seen in secret pornographic movies stashed away in a hidden file on
his laptop. Geng moaned, hands pulling at Kyuhyun’s hair, tugging the younger
boy off and pulling him up. Kissing Kyuhyun sloppily and rolling them over,
pushing the slender boy into the mattress Geng breathed a breathless “Morning.”
Before slipping away, vanishing himself under the sheets and within an instant
hot, wet suction surrounded Kyuhyun’s cock.
If he was thinking more coherently, he’d probably be suspicious as to why Geng
seemed to be able to give head better than he could. But Kyuhyun was too bust
cursing quietly in a long, endless stream of breathless groans to bother
thinking about anything but Geng’s mouth. With his vision of what was happening
obscured by the sheets Kyuhyun could feel and sense everything else in so much
more clarity. Wet, slightly chapped lips slid along his aching member, stopping
almost at the base before drawing up again, action repeated again before
Kyuhyun let out a noise that sounded almost like a scream as Geng sucked hard
at the head of his cock, tongue flicking and softly digging at the slit, one of
Geng’s hands sliding along the rest of the length.
Kyuhyun woke up with a jolt. He couldn’t see, he was crying. He was also hard
as hell. How could he be crying this hard and be so turned on at the same time?
It felt terrible as he grabbed at his cock, jerking it shakily to get rid of
the pressure as he cried uncontrollably. He had no idea when the last time he
cried was. He wasn’t sure why he was crying, not right now anyway. As he came,
hips bucking into his fist he rolled over, burying his face into his pillow and
an invisible damn broke. He wailed, fingers digging into the soft pillows. He
pushed his face into the pillows so hard his nose hurt as it met the mattress.
He cried for hours, half naked, on his own and covered in his own release in an
empty house. He tried several times to stop himself crying, but failed
dramatically as he simply howled and cried himself raw for another few hours.
He realised why days later, as he sat in front of the television, eating
instant noodles. He was lonely. He’d always been alone, at school and at home.
He had never had a real friend to talk to, share memories with. He’s never had
a partner of any kind, never been kissed by anyone other than his mother. And
while Kyuhyun had spent a day and a half stuck in bed, unable to eat, breathe,
sleep or simply exist without feeling like he was falling apart, he had come to
accept just how badly he needed to feel someone else’s mouth on his, and have
beautiful lips breathe reassurance across his skin and then go on to make
everything bearable again with just a kiss.
***** Cheeks *****
Chapter Summary
     Female Ryeowook and Female Shindong - fem!slash
It was a well-known fact that Kim Ryeowook had no self-confidence. She hid at
school behind her double layered blazer, shirt and knee length skirt with
tracksuit bottoms hidden underneath. She wore her hair long and down,
effectively concealing her face from prying eyes. You could find Ryeowook
sneaking down the crowded corridors between lessons, weighed down by her
enormous bag, eyes down as she hid in the shadows. It was safe to say, Kim
Ryeowook liked to stay unnoticed.
Ryeowook spent her dinner breaks sat on her own in the middle of the enormous
school cafeteria. She ate her packed lunch behind a book, eyes watching the
other students socialise and interact. The most popular girl in her year was
easily Shin Donghee. This didn’t make any sense to Ryeowook. Donghee was
everything that should outcast her. She was overweight, she was too
intelligent, she was a lesbian and she was down right weird. But for some
reason, Donghee’s loud and infectious confidence managed to see her past the
ordinary high school rules for popularity.
A year of watching Donghee and her gang of friends for a year, Ryeowook knew
how the older girl managed to keep her head held high. Donghee was, in
Ryeowook’s opinion, a fearless bitch. If Donghee had a problem with someone, or
more appropriately, if someone had a problem with her, Donghee wasn’t afraid to
challenge someone with either words or a good old fashioned fist fight. Donghee
managed to be beautiful, popular and clever all whilst breaking past every
boundary teenage life could provide.
Through her second year of high school, Ryeowook both admired and resented
Donghee as they bustled past in the cafeteria, loud and happy. Ryeowook sat
with her homework and her dinner, sneaking looks at the group every now and
then through a gap in the curtain of her hair. Donghee was laughing at
something, head thrown back as she seemed to loose her breath, hand slapping
down on the table in mirth. Her uniform somehow managed hug her full figure,
without making her look squeezed or too big. The front of her shirt and uniform
was unbuttoned dangerously low, revealing an enormously deep cleavage.
Donghee’s bust was unchallenged by the rest of the school, she easily had the
biggest breasts amongst all of the pupils and even the staff. Ryeowook looked
down at her own chest. Covered over by her uniform, Ryeowook had no visible
breasts. A small pang of insecurity twanged shamefully as she noticed that she
was as flat as a boy. Something warmer than jealousy crept into Ryeowook’s
chest.
Ryeowook glanced back over to Donghee’s table, blushing furiously when her eyes
unintentionally met with Donghee’s. She’d been caught spying. Heating up with
embarrassment Ryeowook scooped up her rushed out of the cafeteria. Head down,
Ryeowook sped through the corridors, slamming into her locker. She stuffed what
was left of her lunch into the tiny metal space before sneaking down the
corridors to the girls bathroom.
When she wasn’t in the cafeteria, watching Donghee, Ryeowook hid in the girls
toilets. She would stuck an ‘Out of Order’ sign on the cubicle she wanted to
stay in, set the toilet lid down and sit with her legs crossed on top of her
personal porcelain throne. She’d sit with her earphones screwed firmly into her
ears and read, or compose songs in her notebook. During her time in the
cubicle, she’d point blank refuse to admit to herself that she wished she had
someone to spend her free time with. Once she allowed herself to admit it,
she’d never be able to cope with the almost crippling loneliness.
There was a loud slam which shook the whole room as the bathroom door was
violently swung open and a loud babble filled the tiled room as a group of
girls swarmed in. Ryeowook, pulled her knees in closer and held her breath.
Minutes later the girls left and Ryeowook let out a happy sigh. She didn’t want
to be caught hiding in the toilets, it’d be beyond embarrassing.
Letting her feet down Ryeowook stretched, pulling out the tension from sitting
perched on a small place. Checking her watch Ryeowook’s heart dropped when she
realised she still had another half an hour or lunch left before afternoon
lessons started again. Sitting back down again, Ryeowook pulled her note book,
flicking to the back to doodle. Her mind was filled with Donghee. All Ryeowook
seemed to think about these days was Donghee. Frowning as she tried to work out
why, Ryeowook paused mid-doodle as the bathroom door was opened again, a
familiar voice echoing.
“…the common room. I won’t be long, it’s not like I’ll fall in if I go alone!”
Donghee laughed and Ryeowook heard the bathroom door click shut, Donghee was
muttering something before falling quiet. Ryeowook sat as still and as quiet as
she could, listening despite herself. Footsteps echoed through the room,
towards Ryeowook’s cubicle. They stopped outside Ryeowook was shaking with
effort to be undetected. The footsteps started again and, judging by the light
on the floor, Donghee went into the stall next to Ryeowook’s. Ryeowook closed
her eyes tight and waited for Donghee to finish and leave.
“What the hell are you doing?”
Ryeowook screamed, lost her balance and fell off her seat. Looking up, to where
Donghee’s voice had come from, she saw the older girls head hanging over the
top of the plastic separating wall. Eyes wide with surprise that didn’t quite
match the smirk on her lips. “What are you doing hiding in the toilets? Are you
a pervert? Do you get off to listening to girls piss?” Despite the vulgarity of
what she was saying, Donghee’s tone of voice sounded more sympathetic rather
than disgusted. It sounded like she already knew what Ryeowook was doing in the
toilets.
Ryeowook tried to scramble to her feet in the tiny space as she spluttered and
denied being a pervert. Tears were already streaming down her cheeks. Ryeowook
had never felt more humiliated. “No! N-No! I’m not… I was… I just… No… I…”
Donghee hushed her.
“Ah, no no, shush. It’s alright, I was joking. Sorry!” Donghee looked around
before carrying on. “Listen Ryeowookie-yah. Let me in, it’s alright. I
understand.”
Ryeowook’s sharp shuddering breaths tried to strangle her, Donghee knew her
name. “I… what? L-Let you in?”
“Yeah, let me in your cubicle. I wanna talk to you and I don’t fancy standing
over the toilet, might fall in.”
“O-oh… okay.” Ryeowook unlocked the cubicle, not quite understanding what was
happening, and was fairly sure she had either fallen asleep, or hit her head a
bit too hard. Why was Donghee talking to her and how did she know she was in
the toilets? Donghee’s head disappeared and then there was a quiet knock and
the door of Ryeowook’s stall was pushed open. Ryeowook let herself fall back
down onto the closed lid of the toilet.
“Hey.” Ryeowook had never heard Donghee so quiet, but somehow she had lost her
intimidating loudness and replaced it with a quieter tone. Donghee shuffled
into the small space, shutting the door behind her. “Why are you hiding in here
then? ….You don’t… have anyone to spend dinner with do you?” Ryeowook shook her
head, crying silently. She wanted to go home and beg her parents into letting
her transfer schools. A hand appeared on her knee. “It’s alright.” Donghee
whispered.
Ryeowook just cried harder. She wanted to try and say something, to sound a
little less pathetic. But her body was fighting against her and warming at the
touch of Donghee’s hand. The hand moved sharply away from Ryeowook’s skinny
leg, moving up to cup Ryeowook’s wet chin, forcing the younger girl to look up.
“It’s alright.” When Donghee had gotten so close, close enough to say the words
straight into Ryeowook’s mouth as Donghee kissed her with a gentle controlling
force, Ryeowook had no idea but it caught her by surprise and Ryeowook squeaked
stupidly into the kiss and tried to back away. Donghee let go, letting Ryeowook
fall against the wall, half off the toilet seat. “I thought…” Donghee started,
looking confused, “You kept looking at me. I thought you were-”
“I was.” Ryeowook said, before she had time to stop herself.
“You were looking at me? You are… you do like me?” Donghee looked down at
Ryeowook, expression suddenly unreadable. Ryeowook had no idea how or why she
was suddenly admitting everything. She heard herself telling Donghee about how
she watched her at dinner, how Ryeowook envied and admired everything about the
bigger girl,  about how insanely attracted to Donghee she was. Ryeowook trailed
off as she gained some self-control over her mouth. She looked up slowly at
Donghee, chewing her lower lip, waiting to be rejected. When hands appeared at
either side of her face and full, hot lips smashed against Ryeowook’s own,
Ryeowook gasped and fell into the kiss, not wanting to think about the
complications when the kiss had to end.
Donghee’s tongue swept across Ryeowook’s lips, trying to part the younger girls
tense jaws and be allowed entrance. Ryeowook seized up before forcing herself
to open her mouth and tried to meet Donghee’s tongue with her own. Donghee
chucked into the messy kiss as Ryeowook gave unpractised attempts to match
Donghee’s pace. Still kissing, Donghee pulled Ryeowook up onto her feet and
pushed the younger, considerably shorted girl against the wall. Ryeowook gasped
and tried to end the kiss to question but Donghee pushed forward, one knee
slipping between Ryeowook’s thighs and pinned Ryeowook where she was.
Donghee‘s head dropped onto Ryeowook‘s shoulder, mouth brushing against
Ryeowook‘s next as she spoke. “I watch you too. In the corridors, slipping past
people going unseen. You’re so beautiful Ryeowook-ah, you’re damn infuriating
because I don’t know anything about you. I want you. As my friend. As something
more Ryeowookie-yah. I want you. Do you… do you want me?”
Ryeowook wasn’t sure, she didn’t know if she was ready for this, if she could
understand what Donghee wanted. But it was almost impossible to concentrate
when there was warm breath ghosting across her skin, hands pressing in
possessively against her hips, Donghee’s full chest pressing against her own
much flatter chest. Ryeowook nodded shakily, mouth having failed her.
Donghee’s hands brushed down over Ryeowook’s skirt, hands sliding down
Ryeowook’s thighs till they reached Ryeowook’s knee, where her skirt ended.
Before Ryeowook could try and panic, another bruising kiss was initiated,
completely robbing Ryeowook of her ability to think. Donghee’s fingers crept
under Ryeowook’s skirt and Ryeowook’s hands which had looped around Donghee’s
shoulders at some point gripped hard in something a little too close to terror.
Donghee murmured comforts into the kiss, reassuring the younger that it was
okay.
From just a kiss Ryeowook was flushed red, she was warm all over and her toes
were curling and uncurling in her shoes. She wasn’t sure what Donghee was going
to do to her, and every new touch scared her but as she got over the shock of
being touched, she relaxed into it, finding she enjoyed the way Donghee’s
warmth infected her though the brush of Donghee’s fingers.
“U…nnie. Unnie…” Ryeowook gasped, head falling back against the wall while
kisses were pressed along her neck. Donghee hummed in question. Ryeowook
blushed as she tried to speak, “I… I want… want you to… I need you to do…
something. P-please.” Donghee replied by sliding her hand further up Ryeowook’s
thigh, fingers brushing up against the line of Ryeowook’s underwear. Ryeowook
whimpered, hand coming up to cover her mouth. When Donghee’s fingers crawled
under the fabric of her underwear at the top of her leg, Ryeowook bit down on
the inside of her wrist, muffling the screech of pleasant surprise. Every brush
of Donghee’s fingers against her skin felt electric.
Donghee looked up, eyes dark as they watched Ryeowook. One of Donghee’s fingers
was brushing in slow, light circles at the crease of Ryeowook’s thigh, along
where the V dipped down to Ryeowook’s core. “Do you know what I like about you
the most?” Donghee muttered. Ryeowook frantically shook her head. “Your cheeks,
your cheekbones.” Donghee pressed her fingers hard into the Ryeowook’s skin
before relenting and sliding a little lower, following the edge of Ryeowook’s
underwear. “They’re startling. You’re so skinny and your cheekbones stand out,
they make your eyes look so pretty. And they dip down, pointing to your lips,
like an advertisement. Like you’re begging to be kissed.” Donghee kissed her,
fingers dropping again, brushing against small neat curls of pubic hair.
Donghee groaned happily. “Of course… you don’t shave, why would you? Fuck…”
Ryeowook blushed furiously, hips snapping uncontrollably at the teasing
touches.
“D-don’t…mock me…unnie…please.”
Donghee tutted quietly, “I’m not mocking you. I like it.” Donghee took her
fingers from Ryeowook’s underwear, kissing Ryeowook again. As their tongues
brushed, Donghee slid her down fully into Ryeowook’s underwear. Ryeowook let
out a loud, muffled shriek, eyes snapping open. She could feel fingers crawling
down to stroke carefully at her clit. Her breath stuttered, unsure what kind of
sound she needed to make, so instead, Ryeowook dug her nails into Donghee’s
shoulder’s hips pushing forward, trying to get Donghee to apply more pressure
to do something more.
“D-Donghee…! Ah- I- Oh god… D-Donghee…” Ryeowook breathed, eyes screwed shut.
“P-please. Please.”
Donghee brushed her lips across one of Ryeowook’s cheekbones, kissing lightly
before whispering, “Ask for it. And I’ll give you it.”
Ryeowook jolted, face reddening. “I- I can’t… say… that.”
“Ryeowookie.” Donghee breathed into the shell of Ryeowook’s ear. “I have my
hand in your cute little pants. I can make you feel good, I can make you feel
so good. If you ask for it. I can’t be sure you want it, until you say it.”
Ryeowook shook violently as Donghee crooked her finger and brushed over
something which made Ryeowook give in, “P-please, please Donghee-yah… please… I
need you to… I- I want you t-to… f-fuck m-me. Please.”
Donghee shifted slightly so her arm was in a more comfortable position and
pushed her fingers forward hungrily, sliding down wet flesh. Ryeowook bit down
on to her wrist again, choking on unsteady breaths. Pressing with enough
strength to let Ryeowook really feel each touch, but not enough to hurt,
Donghee massaged each tender crease of Ryeowook’s sex, dipping till her fingers
were pushing against Ryeowook’s entrance. “You’re so fucking wet, and all I did
was kiss you.” Donghee hissed through locked teeth before harshly pushing two
fingers into Ryeowook. Slick, searingly hot arousal pulled her fingers in and
the broken sobs escaping the younger girl only encouraged Donghee to go on,
fingers bending slightly before she drew them out to the tips and slammed them
back in again.
Ryeowook’s teeth dropped her wrist and she let out a high, loud cry and her
hips snapped violently forward, trembling. Donghee chuckled, “Steady now.” And
with her spare hand pushed Ryeowook’s hips back against the wall again. With
one of her feet Donghee nudged Ryeowook’s legs further apart. Continuing to
fuck the younger with short, sharp pushes of her fingers Donghee caught
Ryeowook’s lips in a sloppy open mouthed kiss.
A third finger edged in along the two already soaked, and Donghee slowed down
her assault, choosing to now run her fingers along Ryeowook’s velvety soft
insides. Ryeowook was moaning into the kiss, being far too loud. Donghee pulled
her fingers out with her own disappointed groan. Pressing her own, larger hips
into Ryeowook’s, Donghee broke the kiss and brought her hand up, shining
fingers slick to the knuckles. “Open up.” She murmured quietly, index finger
pressing at the centre of Ryeowook’s bruised lips. Without any hesitation
Ryeowook parted her lips, tongue instantly darting to curl through the thick
digits.
Ryeowook’s eyes darted up to meet Donghee’s. Donghee was staring right back at
her, cheeks flushed as every flick of Ryeowook’s tongue sent curls of arousal
shivering down Donghee’s spine. Pulling her fingers away, Donghee pulled
Ryeowook’s underwear down, dropping to her knees. Unhooking one side of the
underwear, Donghee hooked Ryeowook’s leg over her shoulder and lifted
Ryeowook’s skirt, holding it up against Ryeowook’s abdomen. The inside of
Ryeowook’s thighs were shining as they shivered in anticipation and
embarrassment. One of Ryeowook’s hands tried to cover herself up but Donghee
grabbed it and held it out the way. Pressing a kiss half way up Ryeowook’s
slender, smooth thigh Donghee shuffled forward till her nose pressed into the
soft curls. “I fucking love girls with hair in proper places.” She mumbled, not
that Ryeowook heard over the sound of her heart pounding in her ears.
With another kiss, Donghee ran her tongue along the very inside of Ryeowook’s
raised leg, gathering the wet evidence of Ryeowook’s arousal, making Ryeowook
squirm. “D-Donghee… please, don’t.”
Donghee hitched Ryeowook’s leg up higher, spreading her further out. Without
any more deliberation Donghee let go of Ryeowook’s skirt and brought her hand
down to her eye level, spreading the hot sodden folds apart with two fingers.
Tongue following the deep dips with slow careful strokes, taking her time to
remember the taste, the feel of Ryeowook against her lips and tongue. Above her
Ryeowook was trembling almost violently, teeth sinking into her wrist once
again unable to tear her eyes away from the sight of Donghee on her knees in
front of her, face half hidden by her skirt as the blindingly hot sensations
ran through her whole body. Ryeowook could feel her calf’s and toes tensing as
something built up inside of her.
Donghee sucked softly against Ryeowook’s pulsing entrance, tongue flicking
slightly. Ryeowook’s spare hand shot into Donghee’s hair and gripped hard as a
loud keen escaped and she bucked violently forward and shook, Donghee’s name
falling unevenly from Ryeowook’s lips. Donghee closed her eyes and ran her
tongue along the now dripping folds, cleaning up with a content hum.
Unhooking Ryeowook’s leg from her shoulder, Donghee stood up, hands going
straight for Ryeowook’s waist as the younger girls knees gave way and she
threatened to collapse. Holding the other up Donghee kissed Ryeowook quickly
with a small chuckle. “It’ll wear off in a bit. I remember my first time. I
couldn’t walk for hours without someone to hold on to. My knees just kept
giving up.”
Ryeowook was still shaking, but she looked up at Donghee with a quivering
smile. “I- um… thank you.” Ryeowook dropped her eyes before attempting to clear
her throat. “W- what… about you?”
Donghee laughed out loud, “You’re sorting that out for me later.”
Ryeowook looked up startled. “I am..?”
“You’re my girlfriend now, and you’re coming over to my house tonight.” Donghee
said happily, as though there was no arguing this point. “And you’re not
spending any more dinner times in the toilets.”
Ryeowook didn’t have the energy, nor the will to argue against the elder and
muttered a quiet ‘okay’. Before pressing her face into Donghee’s shoulder, she
couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt this happy. She pushed Donghee away
with an apologetic smile and awkwardly pulled her underwear back on. She
gripped one small hand into Donghee’s shirt and pushed up on her toes to kiss
Donghee, tongue bravely pushing through boundaries to meet with Donghee’s.
“Unnie,” she said when they broke apart, “You taste like me.”
***** Suck *****
The concrete beneath his feet shuddered, moved by the thunder of music pouring
out of wall length amplifiers in the club hidden away underground. Only the
trembling of the floor gave away it’s whereabouts.
With one last heavy drag of his cigarette, Youngwoon pulled the paper wrapped
tobacco from between his lips and flicked it to the ground, left foot moving
automatically to grind it into the unkempt street. Shoving his hands deep into
his jeans pockets he turned on his heel and started down a narrow flight of
steps leading down to a tiny doorway. Outside sat a bored looking man; tall,
muscular and half asleep. Youngwoon nudged him with his elbow, “Let me in. It’s
freezing.” The younger half nodded, clearly not awake and pushed the palm of
his intricately tattooed hand against the solid door. The imprint of his flesh
glowed a soft blue-ish silver before fading and the door swung open.
Just before the door snapped shut and the door would be magically sealed again
Youngwoon withdrew one of his hands from his pocket to tap the doorman on the
shoulder. “Oi, Siwon-ah. Perk up, Geng’s coming.” Just as the door closed
Youngwoon openly guffawed when Siwon fell over his own feet to try and stand up
properly and rub the evidence of sleepiness from his eyes. Pushing his way
through a crowded narrow corridor, Youngwoon brushed past a Chinese man heading
in the opposite direction with an intoxicated mad gleam in his eye. At least
Siwon wouldn’t be bored anymore.
As Youngwoon pushed past more people, the narrow corridor opening up to a
large, moodily lit room which pulsed with bodies. Every here and there narrow
triangular platforms rose out of the mass of people and on top of these pillars
silhouetted figures danced, bodies swaying to the roar of the music, hands
slithering down their bodies, hair flicking with the exaggerated erotic moves.
Occasionally the dancers would flash as they clicked their fingers, bodies
lighting up with colourful bursts of magical aura. The intense lights
illuminating their magically altered bodies, beautiful despite nature’s
original intentions.
Youngwoon felt hands slipping around his frame as he pushed through the crowd,
hands slipping across his shoulder blades, up his thighs and fingers lingering
burning trails across his chest. They were trying to entice him to join them
and dance, the dancers on the podiums were fierce to look at but the crowd
below were ruthless and wanted Youngwoon to dance. But Youngwoon pushed
through, making his way past the bar and to where another door man stood, this
one much more alert than Siwon. As Youngwoon approached, the door man gave a
wide grin and gave a short nod of his head. Youngwoon smiled and nodded back,
but his path was suddenly blocked by one of  the dancing mob. Before Youngwoon
had a chance to react, the doorman had stepped forward and thrown his own
tattooed hands down violently on to the dancer’s shoulders. There was a dull
flash of red light and the dancer had vanished. Outside on the street, just
above where Siwon and Geng were having a heated argument between touching lips
and roaming hands the dancer appeared, collapsing before shakily getting to his
feet and running off down the street.
After the doorman, this one named Donghee, had let Youngwoon through the door
Youngwoon was greeted to a very different sight in comparison to the pulsing
club he had just passed through. This room was well light, the soft lights
pointed towards the ceiling casting the room in a comforting white light. The
whole room was white, the walls, floor and ceiling all as pale as the
furniture. The sound of the music from next door had been completely cancelled
out by what Youngwoon assumed to be some sort of magic, he’d never bothered to
ask.
The intensity of the lack of colour never failed to make Youngwoon blink a
little more than necessary. The fact that someone who depended so much on magic
chooses to live in a room devoid of colour was beyond Youngwoon’s capability of
understanding. The kind of magic that people like Siwon, Donghee, Jungsu and
himself possessed relied on creativity and inspiration. It is a coloured brand
of magic, every individual has their own colour of magic, but this colour could
be changed by events in their lives.
The magic lived in their pulses, and because the hands have a pulse point just
below the palm in the centre of the wrist, and in the thumb, it’s easiest to
channel the magic through their hands. With enough concentration the magic can
be used for almost anything.
Throwing himself down into one of the large, soft sofa’s Youngwoon gave a
grateful sigh, feet swinging up to rest on the cushion of the sofa, boots
dripping mud sodden rainwater on to the pristine white fabric. Swearing under
his breath, Youngwoon moved his feet and shot to try and rub the mud and water
off, before it stained the upholstery. Using the corner of his shirt to try and
better the now smudged and thoroughly worn in dirt, Youngwoon didn’t notice the
appearance of another man in the room. A quiet tut echoed and Youngwoon froze.
“That had better not be mud, Youngwoon-ah.” The soft voice murmured, sounding
disinterested but a silent threat hung in the air at the words.
“Jungsu hyung… er. Yeah. It is, sorry. I tried to get it off but-”
“You owe me a new sofa.” Jungsu muttered, a whisper of a cruel smirk in the
words.
“What? How the hell am I supposed to get you a new sofa? If you didn’t make me
go outside just to have a fucking smoke then there wouldn’t be bloody mud on
your couch! I’m going to start smoking where I ruddy well like. I’m not yours
to control any more hyung. I’m going through.” Youngwoon got to his feet and
crossed the room, knocking Jungsu’s shoulder as he passed. As Youngwoon sat his
palm on the door, he turned and threw a small branch of white blossom at
Jungsu, who caught it easily. “I only stopped in here to give you that. I saw
it outside. Thought you might like it.” Youngwoon said gruffly, before pushing
the door open and slamming it shut behind him.
This room was once again very different to the two he had just passed through.
And once again, Youngwoon dropped himself into the comfort of sofa cushions.
This time he kicked off his unlaced boots before putting his socked feet up on
to the sofa. He pulled out his pack of smokes and lit one out of spite for
Jungsu. He wasn’t supposed to smoke indoors but he was too pissed off to care.
Youngwoon looked around the room which, since his rather brutal break up with
Jungsu, was becoming more and more familiar.
In a vivid contrast to Jungsu’s perfectly clean white room, this room was a
mash of colours and textures. It belonged to the two main podium dancers,
Heechul and Sungmin. They’d decorated their room with bright collectables,
clothes, toys (both innocent in nature and not), posters and memorabilia.
Mirrors were scattered the room, which made someone unaccustomed to the
surroundings paranoid as their peripheral vision kept catching sight of their
own figure stalking behind them. The room had a long, two seated dressing
table, littered with makeup and underwear. There was also a long second hand,
well-worn brown leather sofa which was drowning in clothes and soft throws.
There was an enormous four poster bed, large enough to sleep four people. This
bed was in utter disarray, sheets, pillows, cushions and more clothes in one
tangled nest that Youngwoon couldn’t deny, it was incredibly comfortable to
sleep in. A large glass shower dominated one of the corners of the room.
Heechul and Sungmin were infamous for being disorganised and spontaneous and so
their room suited them perfectly. After living with Jungsu’s strict regime,
this complete lack of order felt incredibly welcoming to Youngwoon.
Youngwoon’s eyes slipped shut, head falling back to rest against the arm of the
sofa. He felt tense, but too weary to be properly on edge. He was exhausted.
His cigarette suddenly disappeared from his mouth and when his eyes snapped
open, Youngwoon saw the unmistakeable shag of red hair belonging to Heechul.
Youngwoon sat up, hand stretching out to steal his cigarette back. Heechul
shook his head and let out a few broken, smoky breaths of laughter, stepping
back. Youngwoon, now on his feet, was about to strangle the infuriating dancer
when a pair of hands slipped around his waist from behind and nails scratched
along his abdominal muscles. Youngwoon groaned and dropped his hands, cupping
the smaller hands clawing at his shirt.
“Hyung, let him have it, I don’t like it when you smoke anyway. It makes you…
grey.”
Youngwoon detached the hands and turned around, looking down at Sungmin who was
still sweating and radiating a humid warmth from dancing.
“You look exhausted.” Youngwoon chuckled, pulling Sungmin in for a one armed
hug, dropping a kiss on the top of his head. “And I’m not grey. I’m… silvery.”
Youngwoon clicked his fingers in an attempt to prove his point, but his fingers
glowed unmistakably grey. Pouting Youngwoon dropped the magic. “Fine. I’m
grey.”
“Of course you are. You smoke. And that git Jungsu drained any colour left in
you… I look tired because I am. Jungsu has us out half an hour before any of
the punters are even allowed in and half an hour minutes after they‘ve all
left. He’s working us to death, all because he’s pissed at you hyung.” Sungmin
pulled away from Youngwoon and peeled off his sweat soaked black t-shirt,
throwing it absent mindedly into the mess.
With a jolt of his head Sungmin motioned for Heechul to follow as he picked his
way through the mess and over to the far corner of the room, where a glass
shower had been fitted. Youngwoon watched as the pair of them stripped down to
nothing and stepped into the shower, completely unperturbed by Youngwoon’s
presence as they turned the water on and began to shower. Youngwoon watched as
Sungmin let Heechul work shampoo into his hair. It still amazed him how
completely comfortable the pair were with each other. Youngwoon remembered his
cigarette, which was still between Heechul’s clenched lips, now soaking wet and
utterly ruined in the shower. Stepping through the messy rubble Youngwoon
rapped his knuckles on the glass wall of the shower, both of its occupants
looked up.
“Heechul, you owe me a cigarette.” He grumbled, doing his best to look serious.
Heechul shrugged and carried on washing, but Sungmin slinked up to the glass.
He stood directly in front of Youngwoon. pressing his wet and bubbly body
against the glass. Youngwoon pressed his palms up against the glass and leant
in pressing his lips against where Sungmin’s were on the other side. Sungmin
mouthed at the glass obscenely, hands running down himself. With a grin
Youngwoon stepped away from the glass and jerked his head in an indication for
Sungmin to follow.
Youngwoon sat himself down on the large bed, watching as Sungmin
enthusiastically kissed Heechul goodnight and stepped out of the shower. Not
bothering to dry off Sungmin prowled straight over to Youngwoon and straddled
the elder’s lap, fingers brushing down Youngwoon’s jaw. With a happy smile,
Sungmin ducked his head and pressed his lips against Youngwoon’s throat.
Youngwoon groaned, catching sight of Heechul drying off in the background,
before Sungmin forced him backwards across the bedding, lips still attached to
his throat. With a soft growl, Sungmin licked a short line just under
Youngwoon’s jaw before reattaching himself, lips parting slightly to suck
harshly on Youngwoon’s skin. One of Youngwoon’s hands snapped up to grip into
Sungmin’s hair but he didn’t pull the younger man away. He felt Sungmin rock
against him slightly as the dancer sat up to admire the fresh bruise on his new
boyfriend.
Youngwoon looked up, heart thundering in his chest and he could feel the blood
rushing through his system. Sungmin’s demanding dominance always left him
light-headed. Even though Youngwoon was the one technically on top, Sungmin was
by far the one in charge.
Sungmin dropped a quick wet kiss on Youngwoon’s lips, hair dripping water that
ran down the elder’s face, running down to tickle his ears. Sungmin giggled and
licked up a few of the stray droplets, tongue running across Youngwoon’s
cheekbone. Youngwoon hummed happily, not noticing the opposite side of the bed
dip as Heechul slipped between the covers, and rolled on his side, moments
later dropping to sleep, despite the fact Sungmin had Youngwoon pinned to the
other side of the bed.
Sungmin’s lips covered Youngwoon’s own for their first proper kiss of the
night, pressing softly to begin with, two sets of lips moving to a slow tempo,
before pushing a bit harder and opening the kiss up, parting Youngwoon’s lips
so Sungmin could breathe into the older man and taste him better. Youngwoon
flicked his tongue, daring the other to play. When the lithe muscle of
Sungmin’s tongue darted forward, Youngwoon closed his lips slightly and sucked
softly on the younger tongue.
Sungmin pulled away, breathless. Shuffling so he was properly sat on
Youngwoon’s crotch, he slowly rolled his hips, hands flicking the button’s of
Youngwoon’s shirt open. He smiled when Youngwoon’s large, soft hands brushed up
his legs settling on his hips to try and deepen the friction a little. But
Sungmin persisted and fought against Youngwoon, the younger man surprisingly
strong against the elder. Once he had Youngwoon’s shirt undone and thrown open
Sungmin quietly snapped his fingers, the trademark hot pink glow of magic
illuminating the digits. Looking down at Youngwoon, Sungmin felt a satisfied
smirk tug at his slips. The elder look nothing short of debauched, laid
underneath him squirming slightly as Sungmin teased him with small rolls of his
hips, Youngwoon had his eyes closed and lips parted, shining from their wet
kisses.
Leaning over Sungmin breathed a kiss over Youngwoon’s lips at the same time as
his glowing fingers made contact with the elders chest. Youngwoon hissed and
arched up, the hot static feel of deliberately concentrated magic sending his
already aroused nerves into overdrive. Sungmin hadn’t made the touch gentle,
but he knew how Youngwoon liked to feel the burn of someone else’s magic
seeping into his skin, feeling like electricity on first touch, then as the
tingle faded, like hot wax spreading over his pores, suffocating him. Sungmin
chuckled and kissed the gasping older man, dismissing the magic at the same
time. Youngwoon was a such strange kind of masochist.
Sungmin rolled his hips down, feeling the hard outline of Youngwoon’s cock
underneath him. Sungmin breathed into Youngwoon’s ear, tongue curling over the
lobe before ruthlessly biting down.
“You’re hard, Youngwoon.” He hissed, grinding his own naked backside over the
rough material of Youngwoon’s jeans. Sungmin let a quiet moan slip though his
lips at the friction. “If you don’t want to come in your jeans like a hormonal
teenager, then you’re going to have to do me a favour.” Sungmin lifted his
backside and crawled forward over Youngwoon, sitting down on the top of
Youngwoon’s chest. Beneath him, the elder was panting and had already
anticipated what the favour would be and was trying to raise his head, eyes
locked with Sungmin’s as he licked his lips with lewd flashes of tongue. With a
happy moan Sungmin rocked his hips forward, hand dropping down his own chest to
curl is fingers around his half hard cock. Maintaining the eye contact Sungmin
pushed Youngwoon’s head back down flat on the bed and began stroking himself.
Youngwoon’s lower jaw stayed loose, hanging open as he tried to breathe with
the human weight sat on his lungs. Sungmin chuckled. “I should just stay here
like this, and come all over your face. Would you like that?” Youngwoon’s eyes
screamed yes and he subconsciously licked his lips again. Sungmin tightened his
fist around himself, increasing the pace as he jerked himself into full
hardness. “God you’re a slut.”
Youngwoon remembered his hands and brought them up to Sungmin’s backside,
lifting the younger boy up and forward slightly. Sungmin gasped and threw a
hand out to stay himself as he was moved further up Youngwoon’s body, hand
still sliding over his now fully hard cock, the tip of which was now a breath’s
distance from Youngwoon’s mouth. Youngwoon closed his eyes, breathing in the
almost suffocating scent of Sungmin’s sweat and arousal, mixed with the strong
smell of soap. Eyes still shut, Youngwoon pushed Sungmin further up, parting
his lips and swallowing almost all of the youngest’s cock at once. Sungmin
groaned trying to move his hips and sink himself deeper into the hot, wet heat
but Youngwoon held him still, letting himself relax his throat enough to carry
on. He eased Sungmin in further, till his lips touched the base of Sungmin’s
cock, Youngwoon allowed himself a few steadying breaths, nostrils flaring and
brows crunching in concentration before letting go of Sungmin’s hips.
The moment Youngwoon relinquished his hold Sungmin withdrew almost completely
and slammed back into Youngwoon’s mouth, pushing down hard, smirking at the
smack of his balls against Youngwoon’s chin, glad Youngwoon had the sense to
watch his teeth. “That... Was for being a slut.” Sungmin pulled back slightly,
watching fascinated as the length of his cock slowly emerged from swollen lips.
He thrust back in gentler this time, beginning a slow rocking motion. “Well, if
you’re so fucking eager for it Youngwoon, get down to it then.” Youngwoon
complied with a low hum, tongue pushing up against the flesh, flicking lazily.
His hands slipped around the full curve of Sungmin’s ass, pulling the full
cheeks apart and running his finger down the sensitive skin of the crevice.
Sungmin hissed and bucked slightly, but Youngwoon carried on trailing his
fingers down, brushing over the younger man’s entrance. Clicking his fingers,
letting them glow their new miserable grey colour, Youngwoon rubbed his fingers
together until they became slick, the magic becoming a clear lubricant,
covering his digits. Sucking slightly harder than he had been previously on
Sungmin’s cock, Youngwoon pushed a single finger smoothly into the dancer.
Sungmin’s low growl of approval rumbled in the younker’s chest and he tried to
roll his hips back on to the finger buried inside him.
Youngwoon hummed in response, vibrations running through Sungmin like a violent
shiver. Youngwoon withdrew his finger and pulled Sungmin away from his mouth,
the younger’s cock dropping from his lips, dripping with saliva and precome.
Before Sungmin had a chance to complain, Youngwoon had span him around so that
Sungmin’s ass now faced him. Landing a swift kiss on one of the soft cheeks,
Youngwoon bent Sungmin over slightly, so that his hands were now pressed
against Youngwoon’s hip bones to steady himself and Sungmin’s head hung down
low as he panted for breath. Youngwoon pulled Sungmin back by his hips, till
the younger boy was all but sat on the elder’s face. Sungmin moaned when
Youngwoon’s tongue ran along the crease of his backside.
“Y-Youngwoon… You… you slut. Fuck…” Sungmin hissed, rolling back to grind his
ass against Youngwoon’s face. “I can’t… fucking- Fuck!” he swore, too loudly,
when Youngwoon brushed his tongue over his entrance, “Fuck,” he panted before
carrying on, “can’t believe t-this gets you off. Being… degraded like a c-
common whore.” Sungmin steadied himself before peeling his right hand from
Youngwoon’s bare hips to run his palm over the bulge in the elder’s jeans. He
heard a sharp intake of breath from behind him and felt fingers dig a little
harder into his own hips. “A man like you, Youngwoon hyung, s-shouldn’t let
someone as dirty as a club d-dancer own you like this.” Sungmin popped the
buttons on Youngwoon’s jeans one by one, fingers making sure to press harder
than necessary against Youngwoon’s crotch.
“You should be making me suck your cock, I should be the one servicing you with
t- t- ohh fuck… t-tongue.” Youngwoon pressed his tongue flat against Sungmin’s
entrance, bored with flicking it along the crease of the younger’s ass before
slowly pushing it past the taut ring of muscle, making Sungmin temporarily
loose his words. Sungmin finished undoing Youngwoon’s jeans with now trembling
fingers and tried to push them down, choking on his gasp when Youngwoon raised
his hips to help and simultaneously forced more of his tongue deeper into the
younger. Not bothering to push Youngwoon’s jeans down all the way, Sungmin
moved them just enough to free Youngwoon’s own, as yet neglected cock. Spitting
into the palm of his hand Sungmin curled his fingers tight around the base of
Youngwoon’s cock, smiling at the answering moan. “You are nothing more than a
cheap easy lay, Youngwoon.”
Youngwoon thrust his hips up to try and urge Sungmin to do something other than
fire insults at him, words which curled knots of tight arousal in his lower
abdomen. Spending all day working and having a high position alongside Jungsu
running the club meant Youngwoon spent all day giving out orders and being
obeyed. Nothing turned him on more than being laid out like this, as nothing
more than someone’s bitch, being talked down to someone while he made them feel
good. Jungsu had a an especially hard tongue, bitter with every word he spat
and loved having Youngwoon as his own to verbally abuse and use to get himself
off. The relationship broke down when Youngwoon found out about a string of
women Jungsu was sleeping with. Women, and somehow knowing Jungsu was fucking
women with the same cock Youngwoon would hold in his mouth made Youngwoon sick
to the stomach. He had loved Jungsu but Jungsu hadn’t been able to see
Youngwoon as anything more than an easy means to release some tension. Loosing
Jungsu had meant Youngwoon had lost his bright, sky blue coloured magic, the
dank grey consuming it.
Sungmin squeezed him for his lack of concentration and Youngwoon groaned,
realising Sungmin was speaking again. “I said,” the younger hissed lowly, “you
had better get some fingers up there sharpish if you want anything from me
Youngwoon.” Youngwoon withdrew his tongue and, after making sure his fingers
were still slick, pushed two digits harshly into Sungmin, the angle awkward
with Sungmin sat over his face. Youngwoon made a quick decision, drew his
fingers out, grabbed Sungmin by the waist and using his own weight as momentum,
pushed Sungmin over and down into the mattress, so that now Sungmin laid across
the bed, dangerously close to the sleeping form of Heechul. “What do you think
you’re doing?” The younger man hissed before shutting up when two fingers
filled him again and began to piston furiously into him.
Youngwoon leant over Sungmin, biting his lips in an attempt to initiate a kiss.
Thinking about Jungsu had riled him up, he was agitated and furiously turned
on, he wanted nothing more to feel Sungmin’s sharp nails eat into his skin when
Youngwoon finally pushed into him. The nails came early, into the sides of his
neck as Youngwoon suffocated Sungmin with the fighting kiss, a third finger
working its way into the dancer. Within moments Sungmin was trying to push
Youngwoon away and bite out words. “In me. Now, Youngwoon.”
Dragging his fingers out, Youngwoon grabbed hard onto Sungmin’s hips and yanked
them up, sliding his cock into Sungmin’s well-prepared entrance. Sungmin swore
breathlessly and gripped hard onto Youngwoon’s biceps, rolling his hips
immediately. “Not… deep enough.” He panted, so Youngwoon pushed forward hard
and slammed all he had to offer into the dancer, Sungmin shrieked his
appreciation having clearly forgotten about Heechul - still somehow asleep -
next to them. Sungmin tried to sit up, gasping as the awkward movement made
Youngwoon’s cock shift inside him, he flopped back on to the bed giving up.
“Get on your back Youngwoon. I don’t like being under you.” he gasped.
Reluctantly Youngwoon pulled out and laid next to Sungmin, pulling the younger
on top of him. Sungmin impaled himself on Youngwoon again, hands pushed flat
against Youngwoon’s chest as he rolled his hips, enjoying being back in control
of the pace. Sungmin’s hair fell in his eyes as he dropped his head,
concentrating on lifting his hips up slightly and dropping back down again,
loving the feel of Youngwoon underneath him, the elders cock in his control.
Sungmin gripped his own cock and slid his fist tight over himself, eager for
release.
Youngwoon’s hands curled around Sungmin’s hips, not attempting to control the
pace but to simply hold on. His breath ripped ragged from his lungs as Sungmin
rode him. Sungmin increased the pace, bouncing with harsh slaps of skin on
skin. Youngwoon could feel Sungmin’s hands pressed down hard on his chest,
fingers pressing into his pectoral muscles and squeezing slightly. If Youngwoon
had any breath spare, he’d laugh at the younger. For someone gay, Sungmin was
obsessed with breasts and he never missed the chance to dance with a woman,
just so he could sneak a feel of her chest. Any thought’s of women’s chests
were pushed from Youngwoon’s mind however, when Sungmin suddenly pushed his
hips down heavily and came hard across Youngwoon’s torso. Youngwoon swore,
nails digging into Sungmin’s hips as he thrust up in to the clenching heat and
came himself, muttering a long, heartfelt “Fuck”.
Sungmin giggled, gasping for breath, “You can say that again.” Youngwoon
laughed breathlessly, watching as Sungmin smirked at him, sucking two of his
own fingers into his mouth.
“What are you-” Youngwoon began to ask before Sungmin dropped his fingers from
his mouth and ran them through the come on Youngwoon’s torso, then pushing the
dripping digits past Youngwoon’s questioning lips. Without any hesitation the
elder sucked on the wet fingers, tongue collecting the mixed tastes of Sungmin
and swallowing happily. Sungmin smiled, removing his fingers and dropping a
kiss on Youngwoon’s lips before pulling himself off the elder with a groan and
shimmying into bed, pulling the covers up under his ears.
“Come on hyung, I’m getting cold alrea-d-dy.” he said, voice sleepy and failing
to suppress a yawn at the end. “Need you to keep me warm.” He finished, humming
happily when Youngwoon’s form appeared under the sheets, pressing close to him.
“Urgh, Youngwoon, you’re sticky.” Sungmin complained. “Wait there, I‘ll clean
that up.” he said, devilish smile written on his lips, before Sungmin slid
under the sheets and disappeared from view.
***** Lips *****
The drain had caught his eye earlier in the morning.
 
Donghee normally took the bus to college but he’d missed it this morning so he
had to walk. The things he normally saw without really seeing through the
dirty, reinforced bus window passed by him slower as he walked pass them.
 
He saw how many of the shops in the small corner of shops still had their
shutters down, solid and unmovable, defaced with bleeding streaks of graffiti –
misspelt tags of gangs, individuals with a can of spray paint screaming their
existence in neon colours. These shops weren’t opening today and hadn’t opened
in weeks.
 
Earphones were screwed in tight to his ears but he could pretty much catch the
drift of the conversations of the people who passed him. Everyone one of them
looked grey and miserable, brows furrowed and eyes narrowed against the
onslaught of rain and wind. Almost all of them were dressed casually –
sweatpants stretched over bulging, fat stomachs, hoodies and scarfs bunched up
warm around their necks. They weren’t going to work even though it was a week
day. None of them had jobs.
 
Children rushed past him, chivvied along by harrowed looking young mothers. The
rough way the mothers dragged screaming children down the street - older hands
clamped tight around their tiny arms, grip stronger than a snakes jaw - told
him everything he needed to know. These children weren’t wanted. They were a
burden, another mouth to feed. If they could do so without the guilt or without
punishment, the parents of the children - pulsing, ever growing leeches of
children – would push pillows over their sleeping faces, silencing their
expensive needs.
 
Donghee dropped his eyes to the footpath, the safest option in this area, if
you didn’t want a confrontation. The song changed, music pouring unheard into
his skull. The pavement was just as unfriendly as the bodies who walked across
it - cracked, faded and splattered with broken glass, spat out chewing gum with
litter rolling along with the wind. The feet in front of him - bodiless from
this view point - walked instinctively through the dangers, avoiding shards of
glass which threatened to pierce their soft souled shoes. He followed their wet
footprints.
 
He watched his feet move, one foot before the other followed by the previous
laying his weight across the floor to ready for the opposite foot to arrive and
help distribute the mass across the floor, keeping him in motion. Always going
forward.
 
He worked hard at college, and helped out at home. Everyone was proud of him;
he was always set up as an example.
 
 “Look how Donghee’s presented his work in his sketch book; you should take
inspiration from him.”
 
“Donghee, could you help her to understand how to use this program, you did
exceptionally well so you can show her how.”
 
“Donghee’s two tasks ahead of you all and he still has time to have a social
life, you don’t have any excuses.”
 
The last statement wasn’t true, but Donghee wasn’t about to correct any of his
tutors. He was further on with the work than everyone else, but he didn’t have
what he would define as a social life.
 
He drifted though the college corridors alone, sticking close to the wall,
slinking along like the shadow of a ghost. He ate his dinner alone, in the
corner of the cafeteria if it was raining, or outside at an empty bench if it
was dry. His mobile phone was permanently comatose during the day, it only ever
buzzed – proving the existence of other life – late at night. His MP3 player
was exhausted from being used all day without ever being turned off. The other
students only spoke to him when they had to. They didn’t mean it nastily; they
just didn’t have room for him in their busy lives. It was okay with Donghee, he
didn’t have time for them either. He only has time for himself, his mother and
Siwon.
 
At the end of the college day he’d make his way home, greet his mother and help
her with making dinner. He’d help clean up the house, and then he’d use the
excuse of homework to shut himself into his room for the rest of the night.
He’d work, or find a book he hadn’t already read or doodle something vaguely
pornographic in the back of a spare sketchbook. When his mother shouted up the
stair that it was time for bed he’d change and crawl between the sheets of his
bed. He’d lie on his back, staring up at the ceiling, running his tongue across
his freshly brushed teeth. He’d pick up his mobile phone and bash out a
message, hitting send with a growing sense of loneliness. While he waited to
see if tonight was a night where Siwon would grace him with a reply, he’d watch
the dark get darker as the night plodded on, turning pitch black before
relenting and breaking into morning.
 
The sun hadn’t made an appearance this morning, Donghee realised, looking up
from the floor, glancing up at the sky. Fat drops of water splashed across his
face, water dripping into his eyes. The sky was a mouldy shade of grey.
 
Donghee felt the rumble of traffic in the air and turned his attention to where
he was going. He’d stopped somehow, stood at the side of the road and waiting
at the crossing. He pulled his hand from his coat pocket and pushed an extended
finger hard onto the crossing button. Bringing his hand back slowly, Donghee
turned it palm up, catching the drops of water, watching them land and run
along the creases of his skin.
 
Someone knocked into him as they walked past, Donghee jolted, feet moving
automatically after he realised the lights had changed and it was safe to cross
the road. He could feel the engines of the cars reverberating through his bones
as he walked by them, blocking their path. Donghee wondered what it would feel
like if one of the drivers pushed on the accelerator and released the breaks,
and ploughed straight into the pedestrians crossing in front. He reasoned it
might not hurt, if the car hit him fast enough. Donghee felt his feet slowing.
He took a breath and blinked, his mind clearing for a split second, clearing
just long enough to make sure he walked the rest of the way and made it to the
footpath.
 
He was minutes away from college now. The street leading up to its steel and
blue painted automatic doors was almost completely straight, except for the
bridge a third of a way down which stretched over the open drain which ran
through this half of the city. Donghee had always known the drain was there,
he’d gone past it before both on foot and on the bus. But today he saw it
clearly for the first time today.
 
His bag was heavy on his shoulder. Without thinking Donghee stepped away from
the path and onto the grass bank. He slipped the bag off, dropping it with a
squelch into the mud. Below him was the drain. Cold, dark and deep. The
polluted water lay so still it looked frozen. Donghee desperately wanted to
shatter its motionless surface and sink straight to the filthy bottom. He
wanted to sleep there for the rest of his life.
 
Last night reeled past his consciousness. Siwon was the only person outside of
his family who spoke to him, the only person he considered to be anything close
to what Donghee would define as a friend. Donghee had confided in Siwon last
night. He had told him how suffocated he felt, he’d attempted to describe the
hollow echo in his chest. Siwon had listened for hours, presumably judging by
his lack of reply while Donghee broke down through the instant messages, he
listened to how desperately Donghee wanted to feel something real, how he
wanted to understand what his purpose was, what it is that he was meant to do
with his life. Donghee choked on his tears as he blindly tapped out message
after message, confessing to a whole painful variety of self-harming and dreams
of suicide. He asked repeatedly what he was supposed to do, how he was supposed
to cope with this constant feeling of drowning.
 
Siwon didn’t reply for two hours. At ten past two in the morning Donghee’s
phone buzzed against the wall, still where it was when Donghee had thrown it
across the room an hour and a half ago. The message was short. ‘Open your front
door, and be quiet.’ Donghee took the stairs downstairs three at a time, his
set of keys clenched tight within his fist so that they didn’t jingle as he
ran. Slowly he pressed the key into the lock, and pulled the door back, letting
Siwon step through. He had only a second to lock the door again before Siwon
had attacked, pushing the elder against the wood of the door, kissing him
angrily.
 
Donghee didn’t have the breath to question what was happening, when Siwon
finally detached himself and dragged Donghee upstairs as quietly as he could,
Donghee still couldn’t force himself to create words, never mind coherent
sentences.
 
Once the door to his room was clicked shut, Donghee felt the shaking start.
Siwon had let go of him, still hadn’t said anything and was looking at him with
a stare Donghee didn’t understand. His knees buckled, Siwon wasn’t fast enough
to catch him. Sat on the floor, sobbing so hard he felt sick Donghee let Siwon
surround him, the younger boy’s long arms enveloping him in a cocoon of
strength he had no hope of ever possessing.
 
He cried till he physically couldn’t anymore. His fingers scrabbled for
Siwon’s, wanting to cling to them, squeeze them tight enough to convince
himself that they were real. Siwon nuzzled into his ear, making a low, sad hum
noise. He made Donghee look at him and kissed him again.
 
Donghee kissed back out of sheer confusion. He parted his lips, feeling them
stick to Siwon’s own full pair. Siwon kissed like he was trying to breathe life
into Donghee, it was messy and inexpert, Siwon had clearly never kissed anyone
like this before. Donghee had kissed before, but never with any passion. This
was so deep it felt raw, and almost scary.
 
Siwon pulled back, lips swollen. “Take it out on me hyung. Get rid of it all.
Make me feel how badly it hurts.” He whispered, taking off his coat and jacket,
dropping them behind him, before pulling off his t-shirt. “Hyung… show me.”
 
Donghee didn’t think twice about it.
 
They pulled off each other’s clothes, ignoring where they fell, focused on
feeling as much as they could, hands spread flat across expanses of skin,
feeling curves, dips, soft and hard for the first time. Siwon felt along scars,
bruises, wounds still open, the reality of the pain Donghee was trapped by.
Donghee pushed Siwon on his back, laying him out across the floor, descending
down on him, kissing him hard enough to feel teeth. “Are you sure? I don’t want
to hurt you… I don’t want to-“
 
Siwon’s nails scratched down Donghee’s back, sliding around to the elder’s
front before retracting the harsh sting of nails and he nervously, but firmly,
curled his fingers around Donghee’s cock, tugging slowly on it. “Make me feel
it. I need to feel it… You’re not the only one who hurts.”
 
With another frantic kiss, Donghee pushed Siwon across the floor till his back
met the wall. Pulling the younger up with him, Donghee stood, still kissing
Siwon, dragging the younger up the wall. He didn’t want to break to breathe,
breathing was what living, happy people did and that wasn’t how Donghee felt.
So he stayed against Siwon’s lips, catching air in their wide, novice kiss.
 
Siwon had the lips of a sinner. They were beautiful. They felt soft against his
own harsher ones, they were wet with Donghee’s tears, making them sticky,
gluing them together.
 
Stood on the bank, rain sliding down the back of his neck, Donghee peeled off
his jacket, dropping it in the mud.
 
Siwon kissed hard enough to blur out the faces that leered at him in the
corridors, the imaginary people who blocked his way, the faces which leered at
him, judging him, ignoring him.
 
Donghee grabbed Siwon’s wrist pulling his hand away from his cock, he tangled
their fingers together as Donghee lent over the younger boy, whispering in
hurried, breathless pants “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry” just as he pushed into
Siwon raw.
 
Donghee caught the scream in a kiss, hips pushing until he was fully seated
within Siwon. They were both crying and it wasn’t until Donghee tried to kiss
Siwon again did he realise he was still apologising.
 
The pace was hurried, desperate and frantic. The physical kept blurring into
the mental and Donghee wasn’t sure what was actually happening and what was in
his head. All that seemed certain was Siwon. Below him, breath hitching with
every shaking push of the elders hips as he cried, a pained frown stuck on his
beautiful features.
 
Neither reached any sort of peak, after an eternity of moving against each
other, whispering apologies and reassurances, sharing tear soaked kisses, they
collapsed against each other, contented to just exist in their separate kinds
of pain.
 
The rain was freezing. Donghee was shaking almost violently with the cold. He’d
left Siwon asleep in his bed. He didn’t want to wake him, he didn’t want to say
goodbye.
 
Donghee watched the water, surface rippling as the rain picked up, the
crescendo before the main event. Donghee was so cold, so absorbed in watching
the water he didn’t notice his feet carrying him forward, leaving him on the
very edge of the bank before giving him back control over his actions.
 
Donghee stood, the words appearing fully formed in his mind for the first time
despite hovering like mist in the back of his mind for months. Jump. Drown
yourself.
 
He tried to reason with himself, tried to think of a reason not to. Siwon came
to mind, he couldn’t leave his friend. But then again, Siwon had other friends.
He’d get over it.
 
Donghee shut his eyes and made the last step.
***** Tongue *****
Heechul winced when he heard Youngwoon’s voice boom through the boys locker
room. “Well, if it isn’t our favourite Princess. You’re in the wrong room
princess, the girls locker room is in the other block.” Loud, rough laughter
from the other boys answered him.
 
Heechul turned around, eyes narrowed and dangerous. “Well done, I’m glad your
IQ has finally improved so that you’re able to walk and talk at the same time.
Congratulations, oaf.” He spat back.
Youngwoon frowned, grabbing Heechul by his hair and bending his head back so he
could spit his words straight into the smaller boys face. “I’d be careful what
you call me pretty boy. Or else you’ll find yourself eating your words.”
Heechul glared back, biting back his reply, not wanting his nose to get broken.
Satisfied with his silence Youngwoon let go, Heechul shaking his hair before
tying it back in a loose ponytail and finishing changing into his kit. He hated
Physical Education, the other boys never seemed to tire from bullying him about
his femmine looks and quite frankly Heechul was ready to snap any time soon if
he got one more leer, punch or heard the word ‘princess’ one last time.
Making his way to the indoor football pitch, his face dropped when he realised
there was no teacher, and every one of the boys was looking at him, all with an
identical grin on their face. Hands grabbed his wrists and twisted them behind
his back and he heard Youngwoon’s unmistakable guffaw in his ear. “Just you and
us for an hour princess.”
Heechul struggled, screaming and yelling every offensive thing he could imagine
while Youngwoon and some of the other boys picked him up and dumped him on the
floor in front of the small pop out goal frame which was attached to the wall.
A boy each grabbed his wrists and tied them to the frame, as close to the
corners as his arms would allow him to stretch. Really panicking now Heechul
tugged and yelled, legs kicking out at anyone close enough. Unfortunately for
him, he caught Youngwoon in the thigh, making the younger boy swear loudly.
Everyone fell silent, staring between the two of them. Heechul started
babbling, a mixture of apologises and insults as he scrabbled frantically,
trying to move as Youngwoon stood up to his full height and stood over him.
Heechul looked up, meeting his eyes, lips still moving but no words coming out.
Behind Youngwoon appeared Jongwoon and Donghee, both looking down at Heechul
with smug grins on their face. Youngwoon whispered something to Jongwoon,
thumbs tucking into the waist band of his gym shorts. Jongwoon stared at
Youngwoon for a moment before shrugging and moving next to Heechul, grabbing
his jaw and pulling his mouth open, holding it in a surprisingly tight grip.
Heechul freaked, trying to kick again realising what was going to happen as
Youngwoon smirked at him, thumbs pulling the front of his shorts down. Donghee
grabbed each of Heechul’s ankles and held his legs steady.
Unable to move, Heechul stared terrified as Youngwoon pushed his shorts down
far enough to free his cock, watching as Youngwoon stroked himself into full
hardness, rolling his thumb over the slit. Heechul shook, trying to jolt away
as Youngwoon stepped forward, running the head of his length along Heechul’s
bottom lip. Jongwoon’s fingers dug harder into his jaw, keeping it still as
Youngwoon laced his fingers into Heechul’s hair, bracing himself before
thrusting harshly into Heechul’s mouth.
The elder screamed, trying to back away, wondering why none of the other boys
were stopping Youngwoon, why they wouldn’t help. He sobbed as Youngwoon pulled
back, lazily grabbing Heechul’s tongue between two fingers and pulling it out,
digging his nails in for better grip and pinning it down so he could slide his
cock along the squirming muscle.
Heechul cried, hot tracks of tears burning down his cheeks as Youngwoon let go
of his tongue and steadied himself, setting an unforgiving pace and fucking
Heechul’s mouth with small grunts of pleasure, ignoring as Heechul tried to
wiggle away.
Youngwoon tightened his grip in Heechul’s hair, stabbing forward one last time
before coming with a low moan, pulling out from Heechul’s mouth slowly,
watching with a smirk as Heechul coughed, strings of Youngwoon’s release
dripping down his chin.
Pulling his shorts back up Youngwoon crouched down, one hand still in Heechul’s
hair. “The next time you think about letting that big mouth of yours call me an
oaf, I’d remember this and for your own sake, reconsider.”
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